JUST A FOOL FOR YOU ANYWAY
by cancellationbedammed
Summary: This is my take on what went on after the season two finale. Hope you guys like my Jeddiecentric focus. I dont own the characters ABC does...
1. Chapter 1

Hey Guys, Things have been crazy so I have not been able to work on Perfectly Imperfect. This started as a one shot I was working on during my lunch hour and I think it grew into something more. This is my Jeddiecentric take on what happened after the finale… I hope you guys like it… I also saw that there has been much posting going on… I can't wait to curl up this weekend and read all your amazing stories… Thanks for the inspiration and support… I am also trying out a different writing style similar to the quicker pace of the show. Let me know your thoughts, I am also trying to keep it "clean" If you want it a little more "dirty" let me know. Please review when you can… xoxo CBD

The engagement party was finally over, it was just after seven when Janet got into her Charger and headed home. Her head was filled with thoughts of Eddie, everything he had said to her had played over and over in her head. Tears fell from her eyes and she was unable to stop them. She pulled her hair down from it's party up do, letting it hang around her shoulders. She couldn't face going home, wanting so badly to forget that awful night with Rooster. She found herself fifteen minutes later in the hospital parking lot. Visiting hours were long over but Janet snuck past the nurses station and stood in the doorway of Eddie's room. He was sleeping, no doubt from all the pain medication he was being given. He looked worse then when she had seen him earlier, his cuts and bruises darker, he looked smaller asleep in his hospital bed. She sat in the chair at his bedside and just watched him for hours. Again her tears fell, wishing there was something she could do to fix what went wrong. In his sleep Eddie stared to thrash, and punch his arms. He called out Janet's name.

"Eddie, wake up." She said shaking him "Wake up guy its just a dream."

Eddie's eyes flew open and when they focused on Janet for a moment they relaxed and he was happy to see her until he remembered.

"What are you doing here?" His voice was seething with anger.

"I…well… I wanted… I uh, needed…" The quick change in his personality took her aback.

"I told you Janet I don't want to see you."

"Eddie, please can't we just talk about this?"

"There is not a damn thing to talk about." He turned his body away from her, wincing in pain.

"Eddie, please. This is how we got here, but NOT talking."

"No we got here because you took Rooster to your bed."

"Hold on, you took Rory to your porch long before I took Rooster anywhere. What I did does not negate what you did."

"What I did, I stopped Janet, I stopped before it went to far."

"You are… UNBELIEVEABLE! You lied to me all day, over and over, you ignored me and what if when you kissed her you did feel something? Would you have stopped then or taken her to YOUR bed?" Eddie didn't know the answer to that question.

"Janet, I have told you this already but maybe I was not clear. GET OUT OF MY ROOM!"

One of the nurses, rushed to his doorway and Janet rushed out. "Mr. Latekka are you ok?"

"I'm just perfect." His voice dripping with sarcasm "Can you get me some more pain meds before I lose my mind"

The next day Janet started her lunch shift at Sully's. She walked in to find Ray, Matt and the two thugs who beat up Eddie sitting in a booth. Janet marched right up to them and slammed her hands on the table.

"Jesus Ray, what are you doing here with them?" Janet demanded.

"Janet relax, I posted their bail." Ray was trying to be slick "I couldn't have three Cataldo employees rotting away in jail, we have a big job to finish this week."

"That's a load of crap Ray, does Hannah Jane know?"

"Not yet."

"You are such a dick Ray, I have defended you for years but you are such a dick" Matt chuckled and drew Janet's attention. "You think this is funny Matt, really you had to beat him up? Lets go, get up you and me need to have a conversation right now."

"I am not going anywhere Janet."

"So you want to do this here?" Janet was raising her voice and drawing the attention of everyone in the bar.

"You think I care, so what your boyfriend is a little bruised he had it coming."

"He had it coming, why because he got the best of you at Best Friend Windows?"

"No because, you stopped calling when you took up with him." Matt spoke before he could think but it was too late it was out there for all of Sully's to hear.

Ray's jaw slacked and eyes opened in surprise "You and Matt? You and Janet?"

"That's what all this is about Matt, you and me? You have got to be joking, I stopped calling you long before Eddie was in the picture."

"Whatever Janet, he was in the picture long before he was _in the picture_."

"I can't wrap my head around this you and Meadows…"

"SHUT UP RAY" Matt and Janet said in unison

"You treated me like crap Matt, CRAP! And now because I have moved on, now all of a sudden when you realized you what…"

"Nothing, I realize that you were just some fat bitch who I used to screw." Matt was lying, he was trying to save face.

"GET OUT." Rooster yelled from behind Janet. "You four are banned from Sully's!"

"You can ban us, chicken." Ray taunted

"No, he can't but I can." Sully yelled out from the bar. "You guys are done here. I don't want to see you again, that includes you too Ray."

"Sully I didn't do a damn thing."

"You bailed them out, Ray"

The four of them got up from the booth, Matt knocking into Rooster purposely. Janet stood there frozen, as Matt passed her. He leaned in a whispered something to her. The fury built up and before she could think she slapped him right across the face. He went to charge her but four guys from the Duf had been watching the whole thing, they had known Janet for the past year and she always gave them buybacks. They grabbed Matt and pushed him out of the bar.

Janet stood there for a moment, before she stared to cry. Rooster wrapped his arms around her, she resisted at first but then she slacked against him. "I am sorry Janet, so very sorry."

"I know Rooster, I am sorry too. What a mess we have made"

News of the altercation between Matt and Janet spread quickly thru the Ridge. Hannah was livid with Ray for bailing them out but he somehow managed to manipulate her in to believing what he wanted her to believe. The guys had heard about it from Sneaky Pete who was in the bar that day.

"So Eddie, something happened yesterday, I want to tell you because I think you need to know but I am not sure what's going on with you and Janet." Eddie ached at the sound of her name.

"Were over, simple as that." then panic set in, Owen said something happened "Why is she ok?"

"Well, Ray bailed out Matt and his goons, they went to Sully's and well Janet and Ray and Matt got into a fight."

"What?" Eddie yelled sitting up straight in be ignoring the pain in his ribs. "Matt didn't…"

"No Eddie, no… Janet clocked him a good one, he charged at her but some of the guys from the DUF dragged him away."

"He charged her? What does that even mean?"

"Well sneaky Pete said that she marched right up to the table, and got into it with Ray, called him a dick and everything." Eddie smiled. "Then Matt started in and well… I don't know if you know this or not… but I would rather you hear it from me…" Owen hesitated "Just spit it out O"

"Well, it looks like Matt and Janet used to… you know…" Eddie looked at him blankly. "You know Eddie, they used to hook up" Eddie closed his eyes, a feeling of nausea spread through him "And when you came along she stopped calling, so Matt was creased hence the taunting and eventual beating"

"Well that explains a lot."

"Pete said that Matt is in love with Janet but instead of saying that he called her a fat bitch." Eddie's jaw clenched. "Then Rooster stepped in, Sully banned them all and threw them out. Matt whispered something to Janet so she slapped him, almost knocked him to the ground." Owen said proudly "And he charged her, like it was going to hit her back but the Duf guys stepped in."

Eddie rubbed his eyes, he was feeling so much, too much "But she is ok right?"

"She was really shaken up, Janet and Pizza Girl all spent the night at our house last night. And Ikey kept an eye on Janet's place to see if Matt would show up. He didn't though. Steve said he would keep an eye on her too. Were gonna take turns making she gets home ok after her late shifts" Relief washed over Eddie, his friends had Janet's back even though he couldn't

"Thanks for being there for her O, I mean it… Thank you." Tears welled up in Eddie's eyes.

"Its nothing man, all you have done for us over the years the least we can do is keep an eye out for your girl."

"What about Hannah? Eddie wanted to change the subject as quickly as possible

"She was torn between Ray and Janet. Ray has a way with Hannah. I don't understand it. Ray came over later, and apologized to Janet. I don't know if that means anything but he came. He fired Matt and the other two guys."

"I wish you would tell me what goes on Eddie, you and Janet make sense?" Owen said trying to get Eddie back on track

"Not anymore."

It had been a month. A long hard miserable month since Janet had come clean with Eddie. She couldn't eat or sleep, her mind wouldn't rest. Everything that Eddie said to her in the hospital playing over in her head, the night with Rooster, the fight with Matt. She couldn't even find refuge at Sully's because Rooster was always there. Always trying to talk to her, rub her back after a shift or hug her. It was being relentless and he was not taking the hint. Eddie refused to see her or speak to her . When his friends asked what happened all he would say was that things didn't work out and he was fine. That could not have been further from the truth. He felt lost with out Janet. She had changed him and he was no longer sure who he was with out her. But his pride and fury was keeping his heart protected. The news of their breakup spread thru the Ridge and the ladies were waiting for Eddie to be healed up and back on the market. And the men of the Ridge looked at Janet with a different lens, curious about what she had to keep Eddie Latekka's attention for months.

It was a busy Friday night in Sully's, Spring fever hit the Ridge and the place was packed. Janet was keeping up, hopping from table to table, then back to the bar pulling drafts and running tabs. It felt good to be busy, it gave her mind a much needed rest. But then thru the noise of the crowd she heard a woman's voice squeal Eddie's name and her heart jumped into her belly. When she saw him all the air was sucked out of the room, and she could hear her heart pounding in her ears. He was still bruised and he didn't move with his usual ease but he looked good. Janet actually ached for him, she missed him. She knew that this day would come, Sully's was "his" bar. She decided to just put on a brave face and pretend that nothing was wrong.

"Hey Janet" Nick said as he approached the bar.

"Hey Nick what can I get you guys?"

"The usual, and start a tab would ya?" He slid his Amex across the bar.

"You got it." She set up the drafts, a bottle of Owens favorite and the shots on a tray.

"You ok J?" Nick asked with hooded eyes

"Yeah Nick, I am. It is what it is. How is…?"

"He's…Ok… Still healing." Nick shrugged and walked away with the try in hand.

"So Hail Eddie is back I see." Rooster said standing behind Janet a little closer then she liked.

"Looks that way Rooster." He put his arm around her shoulder and made her shiver but not in a good way.

"You ok Janet?" He whispered in her ear. She cringed, threw his arm off of her and walked away.

"I come bearing beers and shots boys." Nick announced to cheers from Owen, Ikey and Ronnie. Eddie was quiet looking in Janet's direction. He had not seen her for a month. The longest month of his life and she looked beautiful but different. There was a true sadness in her eyes, something he had never seen before. She had lost weight and she did move with her usual bounce. _Why can you just forgive her you know you want to… _Anger grew in him when he saw Rooster drape his arm over her, but then he saw the look of disgust on her face and how she threw his arm off of her and he felt a sense of satisfaction.

They guys spent the night drinking beers and shots, laughing and carrying on. Eddie kept a mental note of Janet's whereabouts. He noticed that she was getting more attention from male patrons and he also noted that Janet was completely clueless about it. He wasn't doing badly either, many drinks had been sent his way that night but he was not ready to act on it. But then he saw Janet, his Janet laughing with one of the guys from the Duf and she even did a shot with him. That sent Eddie right over the edge. He set his sights on a tall blonde and an hour later he was walking out of the bar with her.

"Looks like the old Eddie is back." Ikey grumbled.

"Yeah." Owen agreed sadly "Looks that way."

"Jesus Janet, its after midnight." Ray complained after he opened the front door

"Deal with it Big Cat, you are still on my hit list. I need to speak to Hannah." Ray could tell she had been crying and he actually felt bad for her

"Janet, what's wrong?" Hannah was walking down the stairs tightening her robe.

"Hannah Jane, I am going to head back up to bed… and Janet.. Latekka so not worth it."

"I am sorry to wake you guys HJ."

"Janet its fine, really how many times have I knocked on your door in the middle of the night?"

"Too may to count."

"Exactly. So spill. What goes on?"

"Eddie came into Sully's tonight with the guys."

Hannah inhaled sharply "Ok, you knew it was coming."

"I know, I was so proud of myself, I acted like he wasn't even there but then…he left with some blonde…" Janet's voice broke "It's really over Hannah."

"Yes, it is J. Its really over. So you need to move on. No more moping and crying and beating your self up. What's done is done. Go get a hair cut, buy some new shoes , some new outfits. All your stuff is too big now anyway. Get a fresh start."

"Its not that easy."

" Yes it is, you just need to make up your mind and do it."

The next month passed and Janet did everything she could to move on even though it killed her to see Eddie with a different girl on his arm or lap every weekend. She took Hannah's advice and went to the hair salon. He stylist refused to cut her hair but he insisted on making it darker brown to bring out her blue eyes and convinced her to straighten it. Her hair was darker then it had ever been, long and shiny hanging down the middle of her back. It was nice to look in the mirror and not immediately recognize herself. The person she was seeing now was easier not to hate because of the all the mistakes she had made. She felt like a completely different person. She also went shopping, bought some new jeans, skirts and fitted shirts all a size smaller then she used to wear. Next she went to the makeup counter, she wanted a new look to go with her new badass hair as her very gay stylist called it. The makeup girl spent and hour showing Janet how to perfect a smoky eye and nude lip. Buying new things, looking different made Janet feel better more confident. She was getting more attention and better tips at the bar but the attention was making her feel uneasy.

Eddie noted the change in Janet too. The first night he saw her with the darker hair and different makeup, he didn't even recognize her. He was when he heard her laugh that he realized it was Janet. Gone were the baggy jeans and printed t-shirts. She was wearing more black and everything was more fitted. He hated to admit it but his cute Janet was gone and being replaced by a sexy one.

It was a hot July day in the Ridge when Eddie stopped into Sully's for a beer and a burger. He knew Janet was off on Monday so it was safe to go in. He sat in his usual stool when Janet walked out from the kitchen.

"Uh… hey Eddie"

He was shocked to see her. She was wearing a khaki skirt and a white v necked t-shirt, it was so thin he could almost see her bra through it. Her hair was up in a haphazard bun and she had beads of sweat on her upper lip. He had to fight the urge to kiss her.

"Janet." he said with indifference.

"Sorry its so hot in here the a/c is broken again Sully is trying to fix it now."

"Yeah, can you get me a beer and a burger." His tone was short and clipped " And make the burger to GO."

Janet couldn't take his arrogance a moment longer. "Jesus Eddie you don have to be so damn rude."

"I think I am being just the right amount of rude since you are suppose to be off today and this is "my" bar"

"Your bar, Eddie this is MY bar. I work here. This is how I pay MY bills and I am sick of dodging shifts just in case Prince Hail Eddie happens to wander in here. If you don't want to see me tough… if you can drive through three counties for veal then you can drive to the bar at the Johnson in for a beer."

She left him speechless "You… look different." Eddie spoke before he was able to stop himself.

"Well I feel different." Janet muttered as she walked away.

"HEY EDDIE"

"Hey big O what goes on?"

"Not too much, I am just here for my lunch time wings. Hey Janet can you put an order in for me please?"

"Sure Owen. To go?"

"Yup." Owen turned his attention back to Eddie. "So guess who is coming to town for my birthday this weekend?"

"Who?" Eddie really didn't care.

"Brett!"

"Brett's coming back to the Ridge?" Janet interrupted handing Owen a bottle of his favorite beer "Well lock up the bourbon and virgins!" Owen and Janet both laughed while Eddie just scowled

Friday night and again Sully's was packed. Eddie, Owen, Ikey, Nick and Bad Boy Brett made their way to the table that Sully reserved for them. Luckily Karen was waiting tables so Janet didn't have to see Eddie.

"Hey there Janet." Brett said as it sat at Eddie's stool at the bar.

"Hey yourself."

"It's good to see you J. You look good, real good. Heartbreak has served you well."

"So you heard about that did ya?"

"Word does get around. You and Latekka… Really J I thought you had better taste."

Janet chuckled "So how long has it been J, four years."

Janet thought for a minute. "Yeah, I guess so, they last time you were here was for Caitlyn's christening."

"Yup, you know what I remember… You and me christening that storage room. That's what I remember."

"Brett, Cut the crap."

"Come on, for old times sake. Honestly you look like you could use a little Brett time.

"Brett Time?" Janet Laughed and Brett gave her a knowing grin.

"Sully, I am taking my break now."

"Ok Brett, you've got five minutes to show me what you got." Brett pulled Janet in for a long slow kiss.

"See now… what I have planned is going to take more then five minutes." He slowly unzipped Janet's jeans, sliding his hands between her legs. "So why don't we make this five minutes about you and then you will owe me one later."

"Hey Brett, where did you wander off to?' Owen asked innocently

"I had something I needed to uh… tend to." Brett answered smugly. "I don't think I am going to be needing your couch tonight O"

"Who's the unlucky lady?" Ikey asked

"I think I would rather not say, you know protect the innocent."

"Why is she imaginary?" Eddie scoffed, he was still creased with Brett about their showdown in NYC

"Well Latekka, I was trying to be nice but if you must know. Janet." Her name hung in the air and Owen, Nick and Ikey felt like a pin was pulled from a grenade and thrown on the table.

"Janet, my Janet?" Eddie asked thru gritted teeth "Bull Shit Brett"

Brett leaned back in his chair "Actually she is not your Janet anymore. In fact she was my Janet first since I popped her cherry in high school and my Janet last since I just got her off in the storage room." Eddie stood up seething with anger He wanted to punch that look off Brett's face. Owen stood up and put his hand on Eddie chest.

"Eddie calm down, Brett shut the HELL up!" Owen commanded.

Janet came into Eddie's view and he knew Brett was not lying. Her cheeks were flushed pink, her lips were swollen and she had a smile on her face. Eddie knew that smile well.

"You're a son of a bitch Brett." Eddie turned and stormed out of the bar.

"Seriously was that necessary Brett?" Nick asked still stunned about what just unfolded.

"Yeah, it was. Janet is good people. I have known her a long time. She is one of the only girls I have had sex with that I still talk to. So Eddie needs to know he is not the only cock in the hen house. It's a win win win for me. I get to piss him off, help my friend and have great sex."

"How great?" Ikey asked before taking a sip of his beer

Eddie tore out of Sully's parking lot. He was livid. The stones that Brett had. And Janet, she was not kidding when she said she was different. He had tried a million times to get some action in that storage closet. The thought of Janet and Brett in high school was bad enough but the idea of them now was unthinkable. He drove for hours and found himself at Janet's house. He only saw Janet's car and for a second he was relieved. But then he realized that Janet might have driven, he raced over to Sully's. His heart fell when he saw Brett's BMW with it's NY plates parked just where he had left it last night.

"Brett wake up." Janet shook him and tore off his covers.

"I don't wanna" He grumbled throwing his head under a pillow.

"Come on big guy. I gotta get to work, I got the early shift today. So if you want a ride to your fancy car you better be up and out in five minutes." Brett grabbed Janet and kissed her, snaking his hands under her shirt and unsnapping her bra. "Ok maybe 20 minutes" Janet laughed into his neck.

"I think it is fair to say that you are going to be late for work today Miss. Meadows." He whispered as he took off her shirt.

An hour later Janet Pulled into Sully's parking lot.

"What time do you get off tonight?"

"Around 4ish"

"Ok, I'll meet you at your house around six and we can get a bite to eat."

"Ummmm, ok sounds good." Janet leaned in and gave him one sweet lingering kiss.

"You better go J, before you never make it in to work today?" Janet laughed leaving Brett sitting in her Charger trying to collect himself.

"So Brett and Janet went on a date tonight?" Ikey asked Owen completely shocked.

"He said dinner and then sex."

"Wow, it would have never thou…"

"Shhh, Eddie is on his way back."

Eddie eased back into the booth, his ribs still not 100% and passed out the beers.

"What?" Eddie questioned while Ikey and Owen tried not to look at him

"Nothing buddy, so how are you doing?"

"Fine," Eddie said slowly "How are you doing O?"

"He means about Janet and Bad Boy Brett" Ikey chimed in. Eddie's body tightened at the sound of her name.

"Ikey" Owen growled.

"What?" Ikey was trying to defend himself " Are we just going to ignore it?"

"Yeah, that's what "we" are going to do." Eddie took a long swing from his beer wishing it was a shot instead. "Janet and I are over. Got knows I have been…"

"Shagging." Ikey interrupted.

"I was going to say screwing but ok Ike, shagging. Janet is free to do what she wants to do. And if she wants to do a scumbag Like Brett so be it. Sorry O"

"No worries, I love Brett he is my brother but what he said and did last night was a scumbag move."

"I mean what is Janet thinking?" The words left Eddie's mouth before her could stop them, it almost sounded like a whine.

"She is thinking the best way to get over one guy is to get under another."

"Jesus Ikey, really?" Eddie was getting pissed.

"What, Eddie, Janet is different now and kinda hot. Hello. And all the guys want to know what goes on with her to keep YOUR attention for months on end and then the whole Lauche thing. But at the end of the day Janet is a good girl, so if she wanted to get laid its better to pull in a repeat like Brett then to pull in someone new." For once Ikey was making perfect sense.

"That is actually a good point." Owen was impressed.

"ENOUGH!I do NOT want to talk about JANET anymore!" Eddie slammed his fist on the table. "I just want to sit her and drink my beer and enjoy the fact that she is not working tonight.

As if on cue Brett and Janet made their way into Sully's. Brett stood behind Janet, eclipsing her from Eddie's view, with each if his arms on either side of her bracing against the bar. Eddie cringed as he saw Brett tap her on her ass when she went to sit on her stool, Janet squealing with delight and mock anger.

"Latekka is watching us Janet." Brett's voice was smooth and playful and he took a strand of her hair and twirled it around his fingers.

"No he is not." She was trying not to look in Eddie's direction

"Uhhh, yes he is."

"Well so what we are just two old friends having a drink right." She smiled at him as they clinked their shot glasses together and sucked them down. Before Janet could slam her glass on the bar Brett pulled her in and kissed her like they were alone. When then finally broke apart Janet was left breathless and wanting for more. "Wow that was…"

"Well baby, if he is going to look he is going to get a show." Brett said smugly. Janet's desire quickly turned to anger. "Really Brett what are you 12! That was so not cool. Is that what all this is about pissing off Eddie?" Brett was amused buy Janet's quick temper.

"No, but it is a perk." He grabbed her again and gave her a forceful peck

"You never change Brett."

"Nope, no reason to. Another shot?"

"Sure why not." Janet laughed now amused but the ridiculous situation she found herself in.

Eddie was seething and his table was quiet, the guys just sat there sipping their beers trying not to watch Eddie watch Janet.

"Eddie?" Owen was the first to speak "I don't even think she knew you were here."

"Cork it O! I am not kidding."

"But…" Eddie shot him a look and Owen closed his mouth.

An hour later Brett and Janet left, he laughter filling the bar drawing Eddie attention. Janet willed herself not to look in Eddie direction and the blonde sitting on his lap.

"Excuse me Janet?' Janet could not believe her eyes.

"Ummm, Uhhh, Hey… Rory."

"Hey, um… Listen I just wanted to apologize for when I was here last time. I know that I got in between you and Eddie and I didn't even know you guys were you know… dating"

"I know Rory, its fine really. That's water that has passed well under the bridge."

"I know I just still really feel bad about it, you know nothing really happened."

"Yeah, at the end of the day it was not about you. It was about us. Rory, do you want a drink?" Rory felt relieved she had no choice but to move back to the Ridge with her mom and didn't want to be in the middle of anymore drama.

" Yeah how about a white wine thanks."

"How about a shot Rory. I think that if there are two girls in the Ridge that deserve a shot its you and me."

Rory and Janet spent the next hour drinking, laughing and telling stories about Eddie.

"Does he still make that Frankenstein face when he doesn't get what he wants?' Rory asked thru her fits of laughter.

"Oh My GOD, yes he totally does! Frankenstein!"

"Janet this has been so much fun. God I forgot what to was like to hang out with a girlfriend…I mean not that we are friends…" Rory was embarrassed that she even said anything at all

"Rory, we can be friends, in fact from here on out we ARE friends. Tomorrow night is Hannah's stag party. We are gonna start at my house and then we are all headed here, you should come."

"I don't know that might be awkward."

"Rory, Nick's ex Aubrey is coming and she is now dating Nick's brother Ronnie. Hannah and Eddie had sex when Nick left, Ikey was screwing Owens wife Allison for months, I made out with Ray a month before Hannah started dating him. The only two people not in the chain of fools are Phil, the shut in and Pizza Girl and she has only lived here a year. We are so BEYOND awkward." Janet and Rory laughed.

"Ok then, I would love to come."

"Great! I will text you my address."

"Can I ask you a question Janet?"

"Go for it."

"What kinda name is Pizza Girl?"

Hannah's party was in full swing, the usual suspects in attendance along with a few of Hannah's cousins and a few friends from High School. They were drinking, and dancing and carrying on while Sully just looked on a laughed. Pizza Girl an Janet were twirling around the dance floor singing along to Come On Eileen when the boys all walked in. They sat at the bar watching all the girls dance.

"They are totally wasted" Owen joked" I am so not getting lucky tonight."

"The odds are not in any of our favors." Ronnie said sadly

Eddie could not take his eyes off Janet, She looked happy and care free and she danced with Pizza Girl singing along with the juke box. The strap of her dress kept slipping off her shoulder.

"How long have they been at it Sully? Nick asked. He could not keep his eyes off Hannah. He could not believe she was getting married on Sunday.

"For hours, they could drink you boys under the table" They all share in a collective laugh.

"What the hell is Rory doing here?" Eddie asked thru gritted teeth finally noticing her.

"Rory. She and Janet are friends now." Sully said with a smile on his face. Eddie's stomach dropped.

"Friends?"

Pizza girl and Janet made there way to the bar ignoring the guys. "Sully we need another bottle of tequila please." Janet begged batting her eyelashes in jest.

"You think that is a good idea girly?"

"Um, hell yeah." replied Pizza Girl

Rory made her way to Janet hugging her. "Oh my god J I am totally wasted"

"You just need to get your sea legs back supermodel! You have been out of the ridge too long"

Sully passed them another bottle. "This is your third and last bottle, you hear me!"

"Yes daddddd," Janet moaned "Ladies lets go to Mexico!"

"That was a bad idea Sully." Eddie was angry. First of all Janet looked amazing, then she was friends with Rory who was hanging all over her, then she was drunk way too drunk.

"Janet's a big girl Eddie she can take care of herself." Sully walked away not wanting to get into it with all of Eddie's friends.

Janet woke up the next morning, fully clothed and shoed on in her bed. Pizza Girl was the her right and Rory was on the floor to her left. Hannah and the other girls were scattered in various parts of Janet's house all dead to the world. Janet was still drunk the bitter sweet taste of the Cuervo still on her tongue. She left her sleeping friends, thankful she was the first to wake and get a hot shower. "I am never drinking again" she muttered to the air, leaning against the shower wall letting the hot water rain down over her for what seemed like an eternity when she heard her doorbell ring. "Shit" she muttered, jumping out of the shower and throwing in her robe. She ran through her house grateful that the doorbell didn't wake anyone and flung open her front door. She was shocked to see Eddie standing there.

"Uh Eddie. What goes on?" She tightened the robe around her.

He lost his breath when he saw her , hair wet, her skin flushed, naked under her favorite grey flannel robe.

"I uh, just wanted to make sure you were ok. I mean you were hitting it pretty hard last night."

Janet laughed nervously " I am ok. Still drunk actually so it hasn't hit me yet."

"You looked like you were having a good time." Eddie ran his hand over his stubbly chin and leaned into the door jam.

"Yeah, it was one for the books. But I am getting to old for night like that." Janet was confused and oddly nervous.

"Listen, I was thinking J, maybe Sunday at the reception you and I can you know have a drink and maybe you know have a talk about what happened." Eddie had been think about this for a while. He wanted Janet back in his life, if not as his girlfriend then at least like a friend.

"Really Eddie?" Janet's stomach was doing back flips.

"Yeah Jem, I am not sure we can fix all of this but I at least want to try and I don't know…Try."

"I would really like that Eddie. Whatever the outcome I would like to try too."

"Eddie said one drink. That we could have one drink, Which means… I'm going to have to pack 7 months of what I'm going to say into a single gin and tonic,"

"It's hopeful though. Right?" Hannah trying to be reassuring.

"I guess," Janet returned her attention to Hannah's dress and veil.

"It's perfect. Thanks."

"How you doing?"

"Good." Hannah smiled "The good news is, that these shoes are so tight, that it's impossible to get cold feet."

"It's gonna be great."

"Hey!" Sam's voice called out from the doorway

"What up dawg?" Hannah asked admiring her son in his tux.

"The backyard is packed."

"Well Ray's friends with eleven million people. Didn't you know that?"

"Nick just got here"

"Okay," Hannah cringed at the sound of Nick's name.

"He brought a date," Sam slipped in trying to get a read on his mother.

"He did?" Hannah's voice was tight as she tried to hide what she was really feeling

"She looks like a supermodel." Sam added for good measure

"Really?"

"I'm kidding! He brought Ikey."

"Who definitely doesn't look like a supermodel." Janet was quick to add trying to break the tension

"Yeah not so much."

"Right.." Hannah uttered, shocked by how relieved she was.

"Good luck, Ma!" Sam said wrapping his arms around his mother, the one constant in his life. Hannah watched him leave and all her resolve melted away

"You okay?" Janet knew Hannah like the back of her hand and something was going on.

"Yeah, just um…," Hannah hesitated, "For a second there I was…"

"The uh… Nick slash supermodel second?" Janet asked.

"No," Hannah was quick to reply her mind racing "Yes," she finally admitted.

"I don't know, but…" Hannah stopped herself.

"What is it?" Janet asked realizing what was about to happen.

"I can't do this right now Janet," Hannah shouted

"Whoa! Excuse me?"

"I can't…just…I don't know what I was thinking. Sam needs to know! Sam's father needs to know! _Everyone_ needs to know!"

"Ah…I..," For once Janet was at a total loss for words.

"What am I doing…marrying Ray? With this big secret just hanging out there…It's not right."

"No no, no, no, no, please. No, please…no? Please,"

"Yes," Hannah said holding her ground more resolved then ever

"No."

"Yes," she nodded. "I…" Hannah ripped the veil from her head throwing it to the ground "Yes," Running from the room in a cloud of white lace.

"Oh my," was all she could say.

"Janet, was that Hannah I just saw running out of the house?" Ray voice was desperate.

Janet too shocked to form a sentence just looked at him blankly.

"Janet, was that Hannah I just saw fleeing the house? Cause I swear I just saw a woman in a gown race out the front door,"

Janet stood there like a deer in the headlights wondering what was going to happen next.

Ok Guys, that's the end of Part 1... If you want me to keep going let me know… Thank you to Happy Donut for including the dialogue from the online mini-finale in Bridging the Gap… Saved me a bunch of work… You're the best!


	2. Chapter 2

Ray ran out the door in pursuit of Hannah. Leaving Janet standing there alone, a wild rush of thoughts running through her head. She tried calling Hannah, but the line went right to voice mail. She slipped down stairs and found Mr. and Mrs. Daniels. They too had seen Hannah run and then Ray run after Hannah. Sam gravitated to Janet's side, she was the one solid thing he had to lean on. "Did that just happen Janet?" he asked with a mix of hope and sadness in his eyes."Yeah Rockstar I think it just did." Janet wrapped her arm around him. It was decided that Sam would go back to Janet's house with his grandfather and leaving Mrs. Daniels and Janet to deal with the impending blowback. Somehow Janet got talked into making the announcement to the clueless crowd in the backyard. She walked down the aisle alone and stood under the gazebo that Ray had built for the occasion, she whispered to the priest and shock spread across his face. "Um, excuse me everyone may I have your attention." Janet's voice cracked "Due to some unforeseen circumstances, there is not going to be a wedding today. I am sure I speak for Ray and Hannah that they are very sorry for any inconvenience this may have caused. And Mr. and Mrs. Daniels have asked that you all go over to the Johnson Inn to enjoy a thank you dinner." The buzz of the crowd, lead to shock and speculation. Janet froze when she saw Ray storming up the isle clearly looking for Nicky. Her instinct kicked in and she made her way towards Ray in attempt to not bring anymore drama to the day. Eddie sat in the middle of the aisle surrounded by Nick, Owen and Allison trapped. He followed Janet's eye line and saw that Ray was coming. "This is YOUR FAULT GARRETT!" Janet put her hands up in front of her palms flexed and made contact with Ray's chest. He was like a rabid animal. He didn't even see Janet, just an obstacle in his way. His elbow made contact with her jaw sending her reeling back, Eddie literally jumper over chairs and people to get to her. Owen and Ikey were not far behind." RAY!" Janet yelled. Eddie was standing in front of her now. Shoulders hunched, fists drawn. She put her hand on his arm pulling Eddie behind her as she said Rays name for a second time. Her voice snapped Ray out of it for a second. He looked at her and saw the bruise already forming on her face. His whole body slacked over long before Owen and Ikey got to restrain him. "Janet... I..." Tears ran down Rays face. Janet took two steps towards him. She waved at Owen and Ikey to let him go. "I am so sorry Janet." Janet's voice was no more then a whisper, and the crowd that surrounded them was shocked into silence. "I know Ray, I know..""She's gone, I lost her." Janet knew this kind of pain. The loss of the one person you hold dear, your true north gone. You are reeling not knowing which end is up or down. And all you want is something solid, something to grab on to and something that will grab on to you. Janet wrapped his arms around him and he sobbed on her shoulder. "Ikey, call Matt. Ray is going to need him today." Ikey nodded to her turning around as he took out his cell phone. ***Janet was dead tired, she had been looking for Hannah for hours. She went to her house, 32 Gelson she even checked the shed, then to the high school, the point, the lake. She called her parent's house in the cape, called her cell phone a million times. The mail box was full and she couldn't leave anymore messages. Sam and his grandparents had returned back to Hannah's house in case she decided to turn up there. Janet thought she would stop by her house one more time and see if Hannah had used her spare key and was waiting for her there. Janet pulled into her driveway and found Ray and Matt both drunk on her front porch."You didn't find her did you?" Ray slurred"No Ray not yet.""Janet." Matt nodded"Matt. You guys need to leave, I am not comfortable having your drunk asses here.""Janet I am sorry that I hit you.""You hit her?" Matt voice was tipped with anger and shock."It was an accident Matt, I am fine" Matt took a step closer to Janet and reached out to touch the bruise he now realized that was on her face. She stepped back when he extended his hand. "Matt don't" "There was a time when you didn't mind me touching you.""Yeah well there was a time I thought I was going to marry Rick Springfield and live on a rocket ship.. Things change Matt""Leave her alone Matt." Ray stood up," We'll go Janet, would you call me when you find her." "No Ray I won't. Hannah will call you when she is good and ready." Before Janet could react Ray wrapped his arms around her, squeezing her tight. "Thank you for what you did for me today I will never forget it." Eddies truck pulled up just in time to see Ray grab Janet and pull her into his arms. He rushed to her."Ray, let her go." Eddies voice was tight and angry. His eyes jumping from Matt to Ray. Janet was relieved that he was there and she instantly relaxed. "We were just leaving QB, come on Matt lets go.""Wait" Janet called out "Give me your keys Matt" Matt handed her his keys, his hand lingering over her hand for a few seconds longer then necessary. When they were out of sight Janet sat on her front stairs, and put her head in her hands, to tired to cry she just sat there for a moment. "No luck finding Hannah?" Eddie asked sitting next to her."No. None and I went everywhere." Janet inhaled sharply " All I want to do is take off these fucking shoes, this stupid dress, this torture device called a Spanx that the saleswoman insisted that I wear and slip into a hot tub with a LARGE glass of Makers Mark." Eddie laughed lowly "So why don't you then?" "Because I need to find Hannah, she does stupid things when she gets like this. Remember" Eddie was not sure if Janet knew about the night he and Hannah hooked up. But the tone in her voice made him think that she did. A tear ran down Janet's cheek and Eddie quickly wiped it away." Where would you go Eddie?" Janet said breathlessly "What?""Where would you go if something awful happened?" Eddie thought for a few moments"I would go to you Jem." His voice was soft "If something bad happened I would go to you. You are one of the best people I know, and you always know what to do." "Wait. what did you just say?" Something clicked in Janet's weary brain.'I said you are one of the best people I know...""I know where she is eddie" Janet interrupted. "Where?""She is at Caroline Garrets grave."She stood up quickly and lost her balance. Eddie grabbed her by the waist steadying her. "Whoa there Janet, when was the last time you ate or drank anything?" "I honestly don't remember.""I'll drive you Janet, you are exhausted. and I don't like the idea of you alone in a cemetery in the middle of the night."Eddie never removed his hand from Janet's waist as he walked her to his truck. He opened the door and stood there holding her for a moment, he lifted his hand to her chin she pulled away before he could touch her. He inspected the black and blue that was worse then he expected it to be."How is your chin." He face was lined with worry. "Its fine Eddie really." Janet was lying, it throbbed and her jaw was tight but she really couldn't do anything about it now. "No its not, did you even put ice on it.""No, but really its not the first time I have been hit I can take it trust me." The worry mixed with the exhaustion got the best of Janet and those words were out of her mouth before she could think"What?" Eddie was shocked. Janet looked away from him "Janet what does that mean, did Matt ever..." "No Eddie, no... not Matt. Listen I cant have this conversation right now. Ok. Please just take me to Hannah." ***Eddie truck pulled up behind Hannah's car, Janet was right. Hannah was sitting on the bench in front of Caroline Garrets grave, still in her wedding dress with a half drunk bottle of something in her hand. Eddie and Janet got out of the truck"Wait here Eddie ok." Eddie just nodded. Janet took a few steps into the grass and her heels kept sinking in. She tore her shoes off turned around and threw them to Eddie. He smiled at her as he caught them. As she walked she ripped out the bobbie pins holding in her up do tossing them to the ground, letting her hair fall in curls around her shoulders. Eddie watched in awe, the strength of this woman astounded him. "Hannah Jane?" Her voice scared Hannah and she turned relieved to see Janet standing there. "Janet you found me. Of course you found me you know me better then anyone. " Hannah took a long swig from her bottle the dark liquid burning her throat " You told me what Ray was. You told me a million times to come clean about Sam… you told me. "" Hannah" Janet's voice was soothing." I have really messed up this time. My mom can't even fix this. I have to tell you something " Hannah took another swig from the bottle only this time it wouldn't go down. Hannah gagged and vomited on the grass beside her. Janet crouched down and rubbed Hannah back and the missing contents from the bottle found its way out of Hannah's system. When she was done Janet held her has she wept. "Hannah listen to me. You are going to get through this. Ok. You are. When everything went on with me and Eddie and Rooster and Rory. I wanted to die. I wanted to curl up and fade away. But time passes and I got thru it. I realized that I don't need Eddie to live my life and be happy and Hannah you are going to come to realize that you don't need Ray and you're mothers lies to be happy. You are a force of nature Hannah you are going to get thru this. And once Nick knows the truth he will get over his anger" "You're my best friend Janet. And when I tell you what I am about to tell you I am going to lose you too."" Hannah you are never going to lose me. Ok" Hannah took a deep breath " Nick might be Sam's father. "" Might be?" " But it be could Eddie too… "Janet head was reeling for the second time of the day. Sure Janet knew that Hannah and Eddie had a drunken night the summer Nick left. But the idea that Eddie could be Sam's dad never entered into the picture. At lease Janet's picture. Eddie had made his way to the girls when he saw Hannah puke. He knew that Janet and vomit didn't mix. And wanted to offer his help. It didn't intend to listen to what they were saying it just happened. First he heard that Janet didn't need him to be happy that was painful enough but then Hannah's confession of Sam's potential paternity was too much to hear. Janet turned when she heard the air escape from Eddie in shock she turned to him his eyes locking with hers. The mix of pain, fear and confusion. "Eddie how much did you hear?""I heard it all Janet I heard it all. ""Eddie I don't know what to say. I'm… "" No Janet's it's not your apology to make. It's Hannah's "" Well she is passed out so I wouldn't hold your breath. Will you help me take her to the truck?" Eddie scooped Hannah up over his shoulder. He would have carried her more gently but he wanted a free hand to guide Janet. His hand rested at the small of her back and then her waist"You take Hannah in my truck. I will follow in her car. I'll park it in your garage so no one will know she is there""Thanks Eddie""Are you ok to drive ?""Honestly I am not sure but I will go slow And you will be in front of me right?""I sure will J the whole way""Ok. Let's go."An hour later Janet had gotten Hannah out of her wedding dress got two Advil and a glass of water in her before putting her to bed in her guest room. She called Mrs. Daniels and let her know that Hannah was found and sleeping. It was just after two in the morning Janet had been up almost 24 hours and was exhausted. She was shocked to find Eddie sitting on her sofa. "I thought you round have left by now?"Eddie just shrugged and stood from the sofa. His jacket and tie were long gone and his dress shirt was opened sleeves rolled up exposing his wife beater beneath. He extended his hand to her and she took it.

"Come with me." Eddie lead her to the bathroom where her bath was drawn and toast was made along with a glass of orange juice. "I know you wanted whiskey but I figured this was a better idea. Eat get in the tub and call me when you are in. I will sit with you until your finished. Don't want you falling asleep in the bath. " Eddie turned to leave"Eddie thank you this is above and beyond" Janet's voice was hoarse and weak. "No J what you did today was above and beyond. All I did was run a bath."

Janet eased her body into the warm sudsy water, a moan of pure pleasure left her body, she leaned back and relaxed. "Eddie, I am in."

Eddie walked in, and sat on the tufted bench that Janet kept on the side of the tub.

"This was quite a day." Janet mumbled something back that sounded like yes.

Eddie watched her intently, the tops of her breasts just peaking above bubbles, her hair floating above the water. Her head tipped back, eyes closed, mouth slightly parted, her steady breathing keeping a rhythm with his heart. A wayward moan would emanate deep from within her, and the sound and swish of the water when she reached up to rub her jaw. She winced and he felt a pain directly in his heart.

"Let me get you some ice." Eddie started to get up. Janet grabbed his hand.

"No please don't leave." They made eye contact, it had been seven months since they had really touched each other skin on skin, Eddie gave her hand a squeeze and sat back down. They didn't talk, just listened to the other breathe and that was enough. Like Eddie feared Janet fell asleep in the tub, he nudged her awake. "Come one Jem, lets get you to bed." He wrapped her in her grey robe, letting his eyes, slowly take in her naked body, the bubbles clinging to her curves. When she was covered by the robe, he dried the tips of her hair and her feet and legs. He lifted her like a baby and carried her to the bed. He covered her with the quilt her grandmother had made for her as a child and kissed her gently on the lips before turning to leave. "Mmmmm, Eddie… I love you.." Those there words cut thru any anger or pain he had been feeling. It was the first time she had ever told him that she loved him. Tears stung his eyes. "I love you too Janet." He turned out her bedroom light and closed her door behind him.

***Janet's phone was ringing off in the distance. The sun was her enemy as it poured thru the windows burning her eyes. Her mouth was dry and the whole left side of her face was sore and swollen. She reached for the phone but when she answered all she got was a dial tone. She got out of bed, pulled her robe tight to her body and made it to the bathroom to pee and brush her teeth. The smell of coffee found it way to her nose and when she went to the kitchen she found Hannah sitting there crying. They talked for hours, about Sam and who his father was, Ray, the summer that Nick left, Eddie and Gavin. Hannah just poured out everything she had been holding in for over ten years and Janet was there. Hannah finally left to face the music with her parents and she needed Sam.

Eddie's phone rang and he smiled when he saw JEM pop up on his screen.

"Hey there."

"Hi Eddie."

"How are you doing this morning… er afternoon?"

"I am ok, considering, better then Hannah. I just wanted to thank you for what you did last night, I don't know what I would have done if yo.."

"Janet you don't need to thank me… I was… Happy to be there for you. We never did get to have that drink though or our talk, what are you doing tomorrow maybe we can get some dinner?" It was a bold move and Eddie knew it but he took the chance never thinking that Janet was about to turn him down.

"Uh, Eddie, I can't…" His heart dropped "I am sorry I would like to but Hannah and I are going on her honeymoon. We are leaving tomorrow."

"Oh, how long are you going for?"

"Ten days, we will be back next Thursday."

"So you will be back for your birthday then."

"Yes we will be back for my birthday on Friday."

"What about Sam?"

"He is still going to the cape with his grandparents like it was planned."

"That's not what I meant."

"I know, Hannah needs some time to process all of this, when she gets back she is going to have you both get paternity tests done. PLEASE Eddie keep this in the vault until we get back. You CAN'T tell Nicky yet." Anger rose in Eddie but he knew Janet was right.

"Ok Janet, Ok but when you guys get back we have got to work all this out the Sam thing and the you and me thing."

"I know and we will."

"I am going to miss you." Eddie voice was low and tentative.

"I am going to miss you too."

He ten days in Jamaica flew, at first Hannah just wanted to cry and be left alone but over the days she began to heal and relax. By the end of the trip she felt like she could face whatever came next. It was almost eight by the time the cab dropped Janet off at her front door, she and Hannah hugged and Janet was reminded that they had a birthday spa day in the morning. Hannah's gift to Janet.

No sooner did Janet sit on her sofa she called Eddie. They had zero contact over the last ten days and it was killing them both.

"Hey you! Are you back?"

"I am, I just got in my front door."

"Good, I am coming over, wanna go for a drive and talk a bit?" Janet was tired from the travel she couldn't turn him down again.

"I would like that, see you in a few minutes." Janet was already waiting for him on her front porch. She was tanned and relaxed and her hair was back to its old curly ways. She was in a white tank top and cut off denim shorts. She waved when he pulled into her drive way and made her way to the passenger seat of the car. "Well you are a sight for sore eyes J, you got a great tan."

"I spent a lot of time alone on the beach." Janet giggled. God he loved that sound, the only sound he loved more were the moans right before she came.

He pulled out of her driveway and the drove for a while, talking about the trip and best friend windows, both avoiding what they needed to discuss. Janet had been sitting for hours on the plane and her legs was killing her, she slipped off her canvas sneakers and stretched her legs out on to the dashboard, just slightly bent at the knee. She felt instant relief. Like a sirens call that Eddie couldn't resist he reached out and rested his hand below her knee and ran it down her smooth calf. His touch sent a wave of pleasure thru Janet that concentrated to her core. She didn't make a move to stop him as his hand made its way back up her thigh to the frayed hem of her shorts. Her soft warm skin under it calloused palm, cause him to tighten his abs making it difficult for him to even breathe.

"Janet." His voice was a low hungry husky whisper. Janet quickly took her legs down breaking the moment. He continued to drive when she finally spoke.

"Eddie, so much has happened. We are both so different now. " Eddie nodded in agreement. "I don't know if we can find our way back or not, I don't even know if it is possible, or if that's what we even WANT at this point. But I can't remember what it feels like to kiss you, or to have your arms around me. I cant remember how it feels when you are inside me and everything else just goes away for a little while and its just you and me." Janet looked away from him to scared to read his face. " What I did, was unforgivable, but I will never forgive myself. I am not looking for your forgiveness anymore. Its like looking for a unicorn. It will never exist. I get that." Tears were rolling down her face. "I wish you would have talked to me then, when maybe the details would have mattered but now it just seems so useless… My wound has scabbed over and talking about it is only going to rip it open again. I can't… I just can't do that… If that's what you need I am sorry…" Eddie pulled his car over to the side of the road, took off his seatbelt and turned his body toward Janet.

"I was so angry Janet, I mean to have all that anger no nowhere to put it. Because I knew deep down that it was my fault… I pushed you into bed with another man. I took the one person in my life who made it worth something and I made you feel worthless. But what really makes me crazy is why you didn't STOP… at some point you must have thought this is an awful idea. I need to stop."

"Eddie, please I can't do this."

"Please just tell me why you didn't stop and I wont ask you another thing." He was pleading with her, his eyes glassy and his voice choked. Janet wanted to forget and move forward, with or without Eddie. She didn't want to rehash and relive those awful moments she remembered with Rooster.

"I was drunk Eddie, I was drunk. I finished the bottle of wine we had started the night before, those orange beers I bought for you that you hated and then when that was all gone… I called Rooster and her brought me homemade moonshine…" Eddies eyes widened with shock and then sadness " And I did shot after shot after shot.." This is what Janet wanted to avoid she felt like she was bleeding, like every drop of her was pouring out. "Was Rooster drunk?"

"No, he was sober. And he said some nice things to me and before I knew it I woke up the next morning and he was next to me in bed. Everything else is a blur." Eddie reached out to touch her, but she recoiled. "Don't Eddie, this is what I didn't want. But God knows no one really cares about what I want. I am just here to be everyone's everything. You need a friend, someone to make you feel better about yourself, a drink and fuck maybe a hug or someone even to kick to make your self feel tall. Good old Janet the Planet always ready and waiting at the whipping post. And here I am. Even now, here I am giving you what you need when I just told you not five minutes ago that I couldn't." Janet opened the truck door and jumped out shoeless walking in the direction of her house some 2 miles away. She didn't think it through but the commitment was made and she couldn't turn back now. "Janet would you just wait a minute." Eddie jumped out and followed her. "I am sorry Janet, please just stop." Janet stopped in her tracks, turned around and walked towards Eddie. She pulled her hand back and slapped his across the face, her hand stinging upon impact. "HOW COULD YOU KISS HER EDDIE!" the scabbed over wound as now ripped open and Janet couldn't hold back anymore. Eddie was stunned, not just from the slap but form the guttural quality in Janet's voice. "WHY? EDDIE WHY? I need to hear you say it?" A wave of shame washed over him, Janet knew him too well.

"I need to see… I needed to know…" He couldn't bear to get the words out.

"Say it Eddie…" Tears rolled down Janet's cheeks, hot heavy tears.

"I NEEDED TO SEE IF YOU WERE ENOUGH! To see if you were worth giving up girls like Rory, to see if I could feel like I did when I was seventeen" And there is was, what had gone unsaid between them long before Rory ever made it into town.

"You see Eddie, I knew that your words were just words, to make me feel better, that deep down there was always a looming question mark despite your protestations. I knew you were lying." Eddie felt trapped and said the first thing that popped into his head.

"You lied too."

"I never lied to you."

"You said you had NEVER been in a relationship." Eddie was building momentum "but then I come to find out that you were in a relationship with Brett and Matt." Janet was shocked into silence. "Do you know how I felt, sitting there having Brett tell me that he fucked you in the storage room while I sat there drinking my beer?"

"Are you kidding me right now. Eddie I was NEVER in a relationship with Brett or Matt. We had sex, I never told you I was a virgin. I had sex with two men before you. How many were before me? And as far as Brett I didn't "fuck" him that night in the storage closet. And really you paraded girl after girl in front of me for weeks. So fuck you Eddie and your wounded heart." All of her tears and sadness were gone. All that was left was anger. "You never once told me that you loved me Eddie. I waited and waited and you never once even indicated to me that you loved me. We were together for six months, and I had know you for over a decade."

"I loved you Janet, I loved you that night I got punched in the face by the kid from the Duf, I loved you when I asked you to meet Ernesto, I loved you when you when I was sitting in the porch at Owens at the BBQ getting a new one ripped by a 10 year old. I loved you when you wouldn't speak to me, I loved you when I watched you twirl, when you gave me a wolf, when we made love for the first time and when we made love for the last time and every moment in between. I LOVED YOU!"

Janet was drained, her body felt empty, hollow, abandoned. She looked at Eddie with blank unreadable eyes. "I need to go home" She walked back to the truck and retrieved her sneakers. "Janet please don't go. Please." Eddie was right behind her as she was leaning over pulling her sneakers back on her feet bracing herself on the opened truck door. Eddie placed his hands on her lower back. Janet stiffened and she stood turning to him. "I love you Janet." He brushed his fingers over her yellowed bruise. "And I love you Eddie." They stared at each other for what seem like minutes, neither one with the courage or energy to move. Finally Eddie put his hands at her waist, drawing her near him. Pressing her to his body, wrapping his arms around the small of her back. Their faces were inches apart and they just looked at each other, Janet lifter her head slightly, cocking it to the side, a small challenge. Eddie kissed her finally, pressing his lips to hers, a moment seven month in the making.


	3. Chapter 3

I just wanted to thank everyone for all the comments, I know you not all loving Brett/Janet right now… but everything has a reason… Also want to give a shout out to Amy… your comment actually influenced my chapter 2... I was planning to skip over what happed when Hannah bailed… but I really think it was a story worth telling Thanks for your input… the reviews really feed the story… I am sure you are all going to have a lot to say about what comes next… xoxo CBD

Eddie had thought about what it would be like to kiss Janet again, in his mind it was always a kiss of angry passion. Heated, wet, visceral. When he was alone he would fantasize about kissing her, pushing her against a wall, his truck, the bar at Sully's and fucking her until she screamed out his name, erasing any memory or presence of Rooster, Brett or Matt. Reclaiming what was his, only his. But now in the moment, with Janet pressed against him, her soft tender body in his arms, her scent, her breath on his face all thoughts of angry sex evaporated in to the night air. He pressed his lips to hers softly, chaste. Her mouth parted for him, so hungry for what was forgotten. Slow drawn out movements, the tips of her fingers stroking his face over his prickly stubble, his hands gently moving down her body cupping her ass, the taste of her mouth her tongue, Janet moaned when Eddies hands finally found their way to her aching breast, arching intohim. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her fingers his hair.

"Eddie..." Her voice was raw and full of want and need, she said his name again and it felt like a prayer. "Eddie..."

He looked down at her tear streaked face, kissed each eye, her nose her forehead and then her lips.

"What do you want Jem, tell me what you want and I will give it to you."

She closed her eyes, trying to decide. Only one word escaped Janet's mouth.

"More."It was just after midnight, when they pulled up to Gelson. Eddie knew they would have more privacy at Janet's house but he was not yet ready to return to her bed. It was a haunted place. They crept through the back door, Pizza girl and Phil asleep on the sofa. Once they were behind Eddie's locked door, Janet stood before him. Kicking off her sneakers, she slowly pulled her tank top over her head letting it fall to the floor. Next she slipped off her cutoffs and stepped out of them. A step closer to Eddie, who was leaning against his door taking Janet in. Her body still was able to effect him in ways that no other woman could, and while it was slightly smaller then it was the last time he had seen it the effect was just as powerful. She reached back and unclasped her bra, letting it fall off her shoulders, her small breasts still milky white, a stark contrast to her otherwise bronzed skin. Janet inhaled, her shoulders lifted and she finally removed her panties. She stood there naked before him in a way she never really had before. She was stone cold sober, there was nothing to hide, she didn't break eye contact with him, never allowing her self to look away. Eddie just smiled at her, his perfect sweet smile. She sat at the foot of his bed, crossing her legs. It was now her turn to watch.

Eddie kicked off his work boots, and peeled of his socks. Just his naked feet gave Janet a small jolt. Next he lifted his old worn t-shirt off over his head, ruffling his hair. Janet gazed at his chest and abs, a small scar now resided under his right peck, a reminder of Matt's boot. His boxers peaked out from his low slung jeans, and he slowly undid his belt. Eddie made quick work of his jeans and boxers, leaving them in a heap on the floor. Janet let out an inaudible gasp when Eddie sprung free of the restrictions of his boxers. She had forgotten how beautiful, how perfect he was.

He knelt in front of her, she uncrossed her legs allowing them to rest on either side of his body. He ran his hands along them, feeling once again her smooth warm skin. He kissed the top of each of her thighs before he slid his hands up around her waist and leaned in to kiss her once again. Soft tender, their lips moving in tandem, in perfect measure. They kissed like this for what seemed like forever. Softly relearning each others bodies, Janet's hands sliding up and down his back, her fingers memorizing each bone and muscle. Finally Eddie could not stand it another moment, he stood and lifted Janet, crushing his body against his. His hardness pressing into her stomach. He laid her gently back, and covered her body with his like a blanket. He rested his elbows on either side of her head, holding his weight but he was still able to touch her face and hair with his hands. Janet opened her legs for him, he nestled between them and then finally he was inside her and Eddie truly understood the meaning of the word homecoming. He had his world back, everything that mattered to him, everything he needed was wrapped around him.

Janet moaned softly and for several minutes she nor Eddie moved, he was there inside, filling her stretching her and in that moment it was enough. They never broke eye contact even as they softly kissed. It was finally Janet who couldn't take it a moment longer. "Eddie please... more."

He slowly pulled out of her, almost completely before he thrust back filling her again. Janet pressed the palms of her hands to Eddie chest and lifted her head to kiss his neck. This slow rhythm was torture, perfect torture and neither one of them wanted it to ever end. Janet felt it building deep from within her, a tightening that grew. A fullness and a heaviness she had craved. Her breathing shifted and her moans were involuntary. Eddie could feel her release was coming as she tightened around him, he had been trying to hold on, hold back so she could feel what he was feeling, still not changing his pace he shiftedhis body weight slightly sending Janet into a tailspin, losing control of her own body she called out Eddie's name and he filled her with his own release. Janet didn't sleep that night, she just laid there in Eddie arms, watching him, listening to him breathe. Tracing the scar on his chest over and over again with her fingers. The sun came up and she tried to wake him, she had to leave to meet Hannah. But he was out like the big bear that he was. She slipped out from under his leg, and quietly dressed, she took one of his old flannels out of his closet and searched his room for paper and a pen.

Eddie-I tried to wake you, but as usual you sleep like the dead. I have to meet Hannah, she is talking me to the spa for my birthday, I am not going to have my phone on me while I am getting rubbed and scrubbed so I will see you tonight at Sully's around six-ish. I can't tell you how much last night meant to me. How much I needed you, how much I need you still . I don't know what is going to happen but I think we can do this Eddie. I really believe we can. I can't wait until we can be together like this again, maybe tonight? (hint hint) I love . She rested the letter on "her" pillow, kissed Eddie gently and crept out of the house, the sun kissing her skin as she walked home with a feeling of hope for the first time she could remember. ***Eddie hadn't slept soundly since the beating and of course the end of him and Janet, he would wake up in the night sweaty and thrashing fighting people that weren't there. With Janet in his bed Eddie was finally able to rest, the demons he had been battling took a few hours off. But when his bed was empty again, and all that was left of Janet was her sent on his skin the demons returned. Janet's letter now crumpled found it way to the floor on the side of Eddies bed. He woke and reached for her only to find coldness next to him, he sat up abruptly thinking that maybe she was in the bathroom. He looked at his cell phone it was well twenty after twelve, he was shocked that he had slept that long. He searched for her but he knew she was gone. A sick feeling took over him as he dressed, throwing on boxers and a shirt. He walked down the stairs and was greeted by Phil doing his crossword on the sofa."Hey man what goes on you never sleep this late?""Yeah, It was a long night." Eddie grumbled scratching his head. "Yes, I know. I saw your Lady love sneaking out of her at 7:00 this morning.""She left at seven?" Eddie's heart ached, she didn't even try to say goodbye. "She sure did, how long have you two been back together?" Phil and Pizza girl were so excited to see Janet coming down the stairs in the wee hours morning, they laid together on the sofa like little mice waiting for Janet to scurry away. "We're not. I am not sure what last night was. So keep a cork in it Phil." Eddie glared at him and Phil knew that if he wanted to live to see another day he would keep his trap shut tight. Hours passed and Eddie slumped on his sofa, he and called Janet twice and sent her a text he still hadn't heard back and he was wondering if she was enacting some kind of payback for what he did when Rory was in town. After a medley of Queen and Reo Speed-wagon the boys joined Eddie for some "girl talk" the phrase Pizza Girl had coined for their Friday pre-Sully's gab sessions. "So Janet's Birthday is tonight Eddie.. are you going to Sully's?" Owen asked tentatively with an ulterior motive. Eddie and Phil made eye contact briefly"Maybe, I don't know. Why?" Eddie tried to keep his tone indifferent."Well.." Owen hesitated. "Brett is driving up to surprise her tonight." Eddie clenched his fist. "So... Why should I care." Eddie was sick to his stomach. He got up from the sofa, went to the fridge grabbed a six pack and made it up the stairs to his room."Well shit, that went well." Owen muttered"Its better that he know now then find out later, O you did the right thing." Nick offered trying to be helpful. "I just don't understand why he is doing this to himself... he loves the girl..." Ikey always laying things out in the most simple way possible. "You're awfully quiet over there Phiz, anything you would like to add." Nick taunted "I am not saying that I know anything or not, but I would keep an eye on our boy tonight. For his sake and Janet's***Janet spent the day on cloud nine, first the amazing night with Eddie, then the amazing day of beauty that Hannah gave her as a thank you for what she did the day of the would be wedding and for her 29th birthday. They last birthday of her 20's. Janet was rubbed, scrubbed, masked, waxed and buffed within an inch of her life. Her hair and makeup was done and they even stopped on the way back to Janet's and both bought a new outfit for the night. Janet and Hannah walked into Sully's around 6:30 everyone wished Janet a happy birthday as she walked thru the bar, Sully gave her a big hug and told her that her gift was that he gave Rooster the night off and that the karaoke machine was ready and waiting. They joined the table full of their friends that already started with out them, Owen and Allison, Ikey, Nick, Aubrey and Ronnie, Pizza Girl , Rory all sitting there smiles on their faces ready to celebrate. The only absent figure was Eddie... After anhour, Janet started to worry. Maybe something had happened to him, but then before she could see him she felt him, his presence in the bar. She turned and watched him as he walked in, a smile spread across her face and her body literally began to hum. But then she saw him extend his hand backwards and watched as another hand entwined with his. A woman, a tall, blond woman in the shortest shorts Janet had ever seen was attached to Eddie's side. He pointed her to a booth, and made his way to the bar to order drinks. The shock on Janet's face was apparent to all but it was Pizza Girl who really understood its full meaning. Janet couldn't believe what was happening, maybe last night meant nothing at all. Could she have been that, stupid. She drank the shot in front of her, and then a long swing from her beer, it didn't help but it was the only thing she could think to do.

Brett, had just walked into the bar, Eddie sat in his booth watching him make his way towards Janet. Her back was to him and Brett put his finger to his lips to shush Pizza girl and Rory who had seen him approach. He stood behind Janet and wrapped his arms around her, she jumped at the contact and turned, before she could react Brett planted a kiss on her and Eddie noticed that she didn't resist, she even lifted her arms and wrapped them around his neck. And in that moment Eddie felt validated for bringing a date with him. "Brett! What are you doing here?" Janet was truly shocked not only by his kiss but his presence. "I saw on facebook that today was your birthday, so I got in the car and here I am." "Brett that was... actually... sweet.""You don't have to look and SOUND so shocked J" Brett kissed her again and pulled a chair right next to her, resting his hand on her thigh. She knew what she was doing was wrong and petty but she couldn't help herself when she wrapped her arm around his neck and stroked the back of his head hoping that Eddie would see. She would be dammed if she let him see that he got to her. Later that night when she was alone she would allow the tears to flow. But not now. The night went on and at about eight Rory was drunk enough to take her turn at Karaoke feeling sorry for her self she sang _Before He Cheats _by Carrie Underwood. Janet watched her new friend on stage. She was tall and perfect but she couldn't sing to save her life. Owen and Alison were up next with an impressive rendition of Captain and Teneal's _Love Will Keep Us Together_. Janet and the girls all got up to dance when one of the Duf girls started Gaga's Bad Romance. Janet taking full opportunity to show off some moves Eddie had never seen. The guys wanted to talk about Eddie and the blonde but Brett being there made it impossible. The just shared knowing glances.

" Ok birthday girl I would say you are drunk enough for karaoke." Pizza Girl yelled over Gaga. Janet smiled and nodded her head in agreement. She knew exactly what she was going to sing. She made her way to the stage to hoots and hollers. Eddies eyes fixed on her. She was wearing a knee length denim skirt and black open toed heels and a grey spangled low cut tank top. She stepped up to the mic and the music began to play. Billy Idols _Rebel Yell_. **In the midnight hour she cried more more more. With a rebel yell she cried more more more.** The word was not lost on Eddie. The crowd at the bar actually got into it and shouted more more more along with Janet. He hated to admit it but Janet looked and sounded amazing. Brett noticed too the whole table was drunk and dancing and screaming right along with Janet. And when the song was finally over she too a much deserved bow to loud applause. She grabbed her beer tilted it to Eddie who had yet to take his eyes off her. Cocked her head slightly again a small challenge and took a swig before leaving the stage and walking right into Brett's open arms.

Eddie was back in his bedroom, half undressed and drunk, a strange body underneath him calling his name. Everything about her was wrong, the way she sounded, her perfume, the way she felt under his hands. He flipped her over on to her belly, this way he could avoid kissing her. "Yeah, Eddie fuck me." He took off the rest of his clothing, taking a condom out of his jeans pocket before throwing them on the floor. She was on all fours waiting for him. He rolled the condom over his less then impressive erection and surged into her. Everything about this felt wrong, he wanted to run, run to Janet but in his mind she was already in bed with Brett. Was it only hours ago that she was in this bed with him? Something on the floor caught is eye, a sheet of crumpled paper with Janet's very distinctive handwriting scrawled across it. He pulled out, leaving this stranger confused.

"Hey?"

He walked around the bed, picked up the paper and read it. Each word cutting into him like a knife, worse then any beating he had ever taken.

'You need to leave," He voice was stern and haunted.

"Excuse me?"

'You heard me you need to get dressed and go." She was pissed but Eddie didn't even care, she slammed the door behind her muttering something about the Eddie Latekka experience being a load of crap. Eddie laid down on his bed, holding the paper to his chest. Knowing that there was nothing he could do to fix this but he knew he had to try. He showered quickly, dressed and ran out of the house to his truck. He pulled into to Janet's driveway and ran to her door.

Janet heard the sound of his tires on her gravel drive, it was a sound that used to bring her such joy and anticipation. But tonight it only brought her dread.

"Eddie.' she said her voice devoid of emotion. She had cried all night and had nothing left.

"Janet, I just got your note…"

"Just now?"

"Yes, just now. I didn't see it this morning and I just assumed when you didn't answer my calls or texts…"

"You assumed…Is it safe for me to assume that you fucked random blonde #267 before you made your way over here?" Shame filled Eddie heart.

"Janet, please I am so very very sorry. Last night was perfect and I… I just panicked this morning when you were gone."

"You panicked, so you brought a date to my birthday, made out with her all night, fucked her, then found my note, showered and rush over here to beg my forgiveness? Did I get it all?" Eddie nodded not being able to look her in the eye. "Eddie…" Janet's voice finally broke and tears formed in her eyes. "I am done, Eddie. We are done."

"Janet, no…no…no…" Eddie was begging, he took her hands in his but she tore them away.

"Enough Eddie, please. I can't do this anymore. I thought last night was the beginning for us but now looking back it was goodbye, I have to let you go, I have to. You need to find someone who doesn't make you wonder what if and I need to find someone who doesn't make me wonder why me. We are not good for each other."

"Yes Jem we are."

"STOP don't call me that! This is OVER Eddie. Done… No friendship no nothing." She reached up and placed her hands on either side of Eddie's face forcing him to look in her eyes. "I can't take anymore Eddie, please let me go." In that moment he realized what he had done, he had destroyed his Janet and in turn destroyed himself. Eddie kissed her gently on the forehead, their last kiss would be just like their first. He turned and walked away closing her door behind him.

Janet slumped to the floor in her entryway and cried. Deep soul wrenching cries, she cried for more then just the loss of Eddie but for the loss of their future and all the things in her life that had been fucked up in her past.

Eddie tore out of her driveway full of rage. He stormed out to his room slamming his door waking Phil and Pizza Girl. He blindly tore apart his room, throwing and breaking anything he could get his hands on and when there was nothing left he punched his fist thru is wall. Phil ran in and found Eddie sitting on the floor against the wall sobbing. "Phil just get OUT!"

"Eddie, please what happened?"

"Phil if you don't get out of her right now you are going to need to find a new place to live tomorrow." Phil was stunned, not just buy Eddies words, but his tears, and the war zone that was now his bedroom. Phil ignored Eddie's threats, instead he sat right next to him and listened while he cried.


	4. Chapter 4

It had been two weeks since Janet and Eddie let go. Janet was exhausted, physically and mentally spent. Just getting off the sofa was a challenge. She was in her assumed position, laid out on her sofa, beer in one hand bowl of cheese puffs in the other pretending she was watching Paula Deen fry something. She was drifting off into a beer hazed sleep when she was jolted awake by a loud banging at her front door."Sam? What wrong?" Sam stood in her door way, with a tear stained face. A back pack over his shoulder and his one eyed walrus bear under his arm. "Janet... Mom... she told me...that..." He was panting, he ran from his house to Janet's."Sam calm down, its going to be ok. Get in here?" Janet put her arm around his shoulders and lead him to the sofa. Sam took a few deep breaths before he could go on."Mom, she told me that Gavin wasn't my father." Janet's stomach dropped, she had pulled away from Hannah these last few weeks, the idea of Eddie being Sam's father was just something she couldn't deal with. And now here it was on her door step."She has been lying to me, they all have my grandma, Gavin.""Sam, I am so sorry. Did she tell you who your dad was?" Janet braced herself. "Yes, its Nick." Janet wanted to cry, of course it was Nick it was always Nick

"I mean I always felt like he was my dad, but to hear it out loud. For it to be confirmed that my mom has been lying to me. I just didn't know what to do. So I came here. You're the only one Janet who always tell me like it is.""Sam, your mom loves you, and when you were born she was just a kid herself. She made bad decisions but she did the best she could.""Janet can I stay here tonight please?""Sam..""Please, I just need to think and mom and Nick want to talk...""Does your mom know you are here?""No, I just kinda snuck out.""SAM DANIELS! I bet she is scared to death! I am going to call her and let her know you are ok.""Wait Janet wait, can I stay?""Yes, Rockstar you can stay.""Hannah.""Janet, I cant talk right now. Sam... we told him the truth and he's gone.""I know Hannah, he's here." "Janet he is with you?" Relief flooded over Hannah, Sam was in a safe place "I'll come get him right now.""No Hannah, Sam he wants to stay here tonight... he needs to think and wants some space and I think he deserves at least that. So if its Ok with you..."Janet he was so upset, I wasn't expecting that. He is so mad at me for lying.""I know Hannah, I know... but he's a smart kid, smarter then any of us. Just give him some time to work it out in his head. Come by tomorrow around lunch time and you guys can talk in a neutral place ok.""Janet..."Hannah's voice cracked "Have I ever told you that your are the best?" Janet chuckled. "Yes, a few times but it never hurts to hear it."***Eddie was lost, truly lost. There was no where he could go to escape Janet. She was everywhere. In his bed, his bathtub, the kitchen table, his truck. He couldn't bare to go to Sully's or any of the places they would go together. Every road lead back to her. When his phone rang and her saw JEM on his screen it thought he was seeing things. Like a thirsty man in the desert seeing water. "Janet?" His voice was shaky and his heart was racing"Hey Eddie, are you ok? Sam is here, he just found out about Nick.""I'm ok Janet, I mean for a moment I wasn't but then I realized that I have no business being anyones dad, and I am not ever sure if I ever will. Nick and Hannah, that's meant to be. I am happy for them.""Ok, good. I just... wanted to make sure...""How is Sam?""Not so good, he is confused and hurt and scared and angry. All the lies... everyone he trusted. it's a lot for an 11 year old. He's sleeping now..""He's still at your place?""Yeah, he is staying the night.""See Janet. I was right. When something bad happens your the person people go too."Janet thought for a moment "Yeah, I guess... But who do I go to Eddie?""Janet...""Forget it Eddie, Goodnight.""Janet. I love you…" He held his breath waiting for her response. "I love you too."***Hearing Janet's voice even over the phone made Eddie miss her so much more. He started going back to Sully's again trying to run into her. But by his 4th visit he finally but the bullet."Sully, come here for a minute.""What can I do you for Eddie?""I know I should be asking you this, I know that you are protective of Janet but would you make an exception and please give me her schedule. I really need to see her."Sully look at Eddie like he had three heads. "Eddie, have you been living under a rock? Janet quit last week." "What?" Eddie was shocked beyond shocked actually. "She loves it here Sul, she just quit.""Yup, she has been so... sad lately…"That word pierced right through his heart. "She came in one night, and told me she couldn't be here anymore. She felt bad but I understood.""Did she say if she got another job?""Nope, no one has so much as called for a reference. What ever you did Eddie, it was a game changer." ***Eddie was haunted by Sully's words _"What ever you did Eddie, it was a game changer." _Repeated over and over in his head. He had enough. He needed to see Janet and try to make it right. He pulled into her drive way, her lights were on and the charger was parked."Uh, Rory...Um can I speak to Janet?" Eddie was surprised when Rory opened the door to Janet's house in her pajamas. "Eddie, she's not here.""Oh," It was just after nine, he couldn't imagine where she could be. Was she on a date or maybe she got a new job at the Johnson Inn?" Well do you mind if I wait until she gets back. I really need to talk to her" Rory's smiled dropped."Eddie, she is in NY. I am house sitting for her. She won't be back for a few more days." Eddie felt like he got slapped across the face. "She's in NY with Brett?""Eddie, I don't want to get in the middle...""No you're right I'm sorry, Listen DON'T tell her I came by ok?""Ok Eddie if that what you want."***"Brett, This has been a great week, just what I needed thank you." The sat in the airport bar waiting for Janet's plane to be called. "And I hope I made up for my birthday…" Janet winked at him. "Hell yeah, you did... J I kinda like having you around. You should..." Brett stopped, not really knowing what he wanted to say. "You should think about moving here for real. I know you and Rory have been talking about it but...I would like to have you around more..." Janet smiled at him "I mean I am not saying you know move here for me. But I think it would be good for you. To get away from the god forsaken ridge." "Oh cause for a second there I thought you were asking me. Well you know " Janet smirked. "cause I kinda like what we have going right now Brett its always worked for us. You do your thing I do mine and sometimes we do it together. " Brett laughed. "See J this is why I keep you around you get me. But seriously I know things here are expensive. But I can call in a favor or two and find you a great place and a job. You would be happy here. ""Brett can I tell you a secret." He nodded. "I have money""What do you mean you have money?""Well my mom and both my grandparents had life insurance policy's. I have never touched a cent. I always felt I don't know… guilty living off death money. So I worked… But I think I have got to get over it you know.""How much money are we talking J? I am in finance for Christ's sake I could have invested it for you. ""I have it invested for almost 10 years it's just under $350,000."

Brett was floored "You have got to be fucking kidding me J! You are full of surprises aren't you. Working at Sully's all those years."

"Sully's was my home, my family."

"So then you will think about it. Moving here?"Janet smiled at him sipping her drink"Yeah I'll think about it."

Hannah walked into Best Friend Windows with a mission.

"Hey Hannah, what goes on?" Nick asked happy to see her. The last few weeks had been hard on them but they were coming out the other side and Sam had started calling Nick dad.

"Hey Nick. Actually I am here to see Eddie."

"Me?" Eddie said with a mouth full of a meatball sub.

"Yeah you have a few minutes… It about Janet."

"Janet?" Eddie wiped off his mouth and stood up "Is she ok?"

"That's the thing, I don't think she is and I don't know what to do."

"Spill it Hannah."

"Well, you know she went to NY right." Eddie nodded, trying not to think about it "Well she came back and she was… well she was happy and I thought Janet was coming back to me you know. Our Janet. I have really missed her. Then two weeks ago Sam said that he and Doodie were skateboarding in the town square and they saw Janet coming out of the doctors office crying."

"She was crying?" Eddie tried to swallow the growing lump in his throat.

"Yeah, so I called her and she said she had the flu but Eddie I knew she was lying and then nothing radio silence. I called, I went over there. I even called Rory and she said its been a week since she spoke to Janet and her calls were unreturned too." Hannah's voice was strained "What if there is something wrong with our girl Eddie. I just an so confused. And she has totally shut me out." Eddie's mind was reeling, _What of something is wrong with our girl. _But he knew she wasn't really his anymore.

"Hannah, Did you call Brett, or maybe I can talk to O?"

"Are you kidding Eddie, Brett and Janet aren't like that. They are not together they just… you know… it's a friends with benefits thing. If something is going on she is not going to turn to Brett."

"I don't think she wants to see me Hannah."

"Eddie, I think you are probably the only person she would want to see if something was wrong." Nick chimed in "She is just to stubborn to ask."

Eddie had a flash of something Janet had said to him _But who do I go to Eddie?_

Eddie pulled up to Janet's house, he knocked on her door and rang the bell but there was no answer. He pulled the key ring out of his pocket. She had given it to him the morning Rory came and their world exploded. He had never used the key until tonight. He walked thru her house and it felt so familiar but to strange. Thing were different out of place. It wasn't a mess, but for Janet who liked a kept organized house things were very much amiss. He walked in to her room and Janet was curled up in the middle her bed, in one of his old flannels, asleep. She looked so tortured, her face was tear stained and her cheeks were puffy. He wanted to badly to lie next to her.

"Janet." He said softly as he gently rubbed her shoulder. "Janet, wake up."

"Eddie." Her voice was like a whisper. "Mmmm, Eddie." She curled her body up tighter.

"Jem, wake up." He nudged her once more and Janet opened her eyes. She smiled at him briefly and then when she realized that he was not a dream but standing in her bedroom she shot up in her bed.

"Eddie how did you get in here?"

"Uh… I used my key."

"Eddie, just go ok."

"Janet, we are worried about you, Hannah is losing her mind."

"I told Hannah I am fine. And you should not have just let yourself in here." Janet felt so naked, exposed in her bed wrapped in Eddies flannel. She didn't want him to see her like this.

"Janet, what is going on. You look so sad and your place for you is a mess and you shut out Hannah and Sam, Rory Pizza Girl they are all worried about you."

"So they sent you in to what fix me?" Janet laughed. "Just Get out Eddie. In fact there is a box of your shit in my broom closet, take it with you an leave MY key on the counter." Janet curled back on her bed and pulled the blanket dismissing him.

"Janet?" Eddie pleaded.

"EDDIE JUST GET YOUR SHIT AND GO!"

Eddie turned and walked toward the kitchen, he found the box and placed the key on her counter like he was asked. On his way out he saw the garbage bag that needed to be taken out. It lifted it out of the can and as he tied it something inside caught his eye.

"Janet, Janet don't ignore me. What is this?"

Janet turned around and looked at what Eddie was holding. She felt sick.

"Eddie, that is none of your business… " Eddie gave her a look letting her know that was not an acceptable answer "Ok Eddie its prenatal vitamins and What to Expect When You Are Expecting. Happy now." Janet had tears in her eye. Eddie swallowed before he spoke.

"Janet are you…" His world was spinning out of control.

"No, not anymore."

"Anymore?"

"I was, and four days ago I had a miscarriage." Eddie was stunned and his heart was breaking more with each word.

"Janet, was it mine…"

"Yes, of course it was… that night… that amazing night… we made a baby…" Janet's voice was raw " I didn't know… until two weeks ago… I have been drinking so much and I haven't been eating… I went to NY and I flew… The doctor says that it happens and that it probably would have happened regardless. She gave me all this statistics… but Eddie if I would have known… I would have done things so differently." She was sobbing now, deep sobs, that rattled her entire body. Eddie Sat beside her on the bed and wrapped his arms around her.

"Why didn't you tell me or Hannah."

"I just couldn't, I don't know I just didn't want another awful thing to happen and if you didn't know it wasn't really… real…" He held her tighter, wishing that things could be different that he could go back in time to that day in the shop when Rory was standing in front of him and Janet called. He wished her would tell her that Rory was there and that he was coming in for lunch and most of all he wished he would have said I love you. If he had just said those three words everything would have been different.

"Come on Janet, let's just lay down and try and get some rest ok."

"Eddie you don't.."

"Stop Janet, just stop. I need to be here as much and you need me here. Please let me just hold you ok?"

They curled up together. Janet's back to Eddie's front. His one arm under her neck the other locked tightly around her waist. It felt so good to be in his arms again, safe. His breath on the back of her neck, her cold feet tucked between his warm calves. Her fingers linked with is. It was as close to peace that Janet had been for a very long time. They drifted off to sleep and for a little while they could forget.

Janet walked up to 32 Gelson, the air was cold and the snow covered ground made everything feel fresh. It had been weeks since she had last seen Eddie and what she had to tell him need to be said face to face. She owed him at least that. She knocked on the door and Phil flung it open "JANET!" He grabbed her in to a bear hug. "God I have missed you!"

"I have miss you to Phil, God it had been… a while… I am sorry I haven't…"

"I get it Janet, shut it… Limits where we can hang out you know. Want to come in?"

"Uh, no that's ok could you just get Eddie for me."

"Sure he's upstairs, are you sure you don't just want to go up." Janet just shook her head no. She couldn't stomach the idea of being in his room.

"Hey Janet." Eddie said as he pulled on his old, lambs wool collared jacket. "Shit is cold out here, are you sure you don't want to come in?"

"No this will just take a second." Eddie was nervous, he didn't know what Janet was going to say, They hadn't spoken since that night he held her.

"Ok, is everything ok?"

"Yeah, actually everything is great actually. I wanted to let you know before you heard from someone else…" Eddie braced himself " I am moving to NY, actually Rory and I we got an apartment."

"What?" Janet was leaving the Ridge. How could this be happening.

"Yeah, I need to get away from here and start over…"

"With Brett?"

"Brett is part of it, it's so easy with him Eddie, I know where I stand I know what to expect." Eddie gritted his teeth, holding back what he really wanted to say.

"What about your house?"

"Well, I am just going to close it up, Ray said he would keep an eye out for it and keep the grass cut and stuff. I can't sell it, it's the only home I have ever known and its paid off."

"When are you leaving?"

"Saturday, Sully is going to have a little send off in the morning before we leave. I hope… I hope you will come to say goodbye."

"Of course I will be there Janet… To say goodbye." Eddie felt like he had just been punched in the gut, unable to breathe.

"Ok, then I will see you then. Bye Eddie."

It was late Friday night and Janet was packing the last minute things she was going to need, their place came furnished. Brett did pull in some favors and found them a great place in walking distance to his. She wanted pictures mostly, the blanket her grandmother made her, a few books and she was good to go. She was just about to turn in for the night when she heard his tires hit the gravel.

"Janet. I know I said that I would say goodbye tomorrow but I need to talk to you before you leave. Can I please come in?"

"Eddie, it's late…"

"Janet, please…"

"Sure, of course, come in."

"I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. All I really can do is think. About everything I did wrong, all the things I should have said but didn't. And I don't want to look back on this night and feel like I didn't say what needed to be said." He took Janet's hand and lead her to the sofa. " Do remember the first time me met?" Janet smiled and nodded. "It was the summer between Junior and Senior year. I mean you had started in the middle of junior year, and I saw you in the hall and stuff. But it was that Saturday when Hannah brought you into Murph's and introduced you to the gang."

"I remember. That morning at the park Hannah and I bonded over Fleetwood Mac and Nina Simone and she decided that we were going to be friends. She waived her magic wand and made it so"

"You sat in the booth, you were so shy, so quiet. And I remember thinking how pretty you were. Like a flower… a daisy. So simple. Ikey was trying to impress you making jokes and you said something that made him look stupid. And we all laughed. You didn't mean to, but you were snarky even then. You blushed hot pink and then went back to saying nothing. If I could go back to that day Janet… I would tell you how beautiful you were, and how special and perfect you were. I would tell you that you were enough." Janet shook her head no, trying to hold back tears. "Janet you are enough. I would have kissed you and made you mine then. I would have saved you from Brett and Matt and this version of myself. And we would have been the couple who met in high school and made it last a life time. We would be married now and have kids making us crazy. Everything would have been different." Janet wrapped her arms around him and allowed the tears to flow. "I know I have to let you go Jem, I know I do… but" Eddie's voice cracked "but that I am going to hold on to. You in that booth and me watching you. I think I even loved you then. So you go and you be who you are suppose to be, and I'll just hold on to that one part of you ok."

"Eddie, oh God. Eddie." She held on to him tighter. "I want you to find some one who makes you happy, someone who knows your more then just something to experience. Someone who deserves you. Who gets you, who won't try to change you. Someone who could give you what I never would or could."

"Janet you gave me everything I needed, I just didn't realize it until it was to late." She brushed the tears from his cheeks. " I'm not going to stop loving you Jem. No matter who or what comes next."

"Either will I Eddie."

Rory and Janet pulled up to Sully's the next morning, car packed ready to go.

"You ready for this J?" Rory put her hand on Janet's shoulders and pushed her through the front door. Everyone was there, Hannah and Nick, Sam, Owen and Allison, Pizza Girl, Aubrey and Ronnie, Sully, Karen, and of course Eddie. Janet didn't think she was capable of shedding another tear but as she said her good bys they flowed. They joked about her becoming a Yankee fan and eating nothing but bagels and hot dogs, They told stupid stories and laughed together. Everyone realized that Eddie and Janet wanted a few minutes alone. So they said their final goodbyes, and left. She wrapped her arms around his neck and clung to her waist.

"I hope you find what you are looking for Jem."

"Me too. I miss you already." Eddie kissed her softly. "Ok, bye Eddie."

"Bye Janet." Eddie whispered

She turned to leave, when Rooster stormed into room. "Oh good, you're still here!"

"Rooster, I told you not to come." Sully growled

"I have to talk to Janet before she leaves."

"Rooster I really have nothing to say to you, except good bye."

'Janet please, just wait you have been my only friend all these years."

"Really you have a shitty way of being a friend, a friend wouldn't have had sex with me while I was DRUNK and HEARTBROKEN. A friend would put me to bed with some Advil and a glass of water. As far as I am concerned I hope I never see you again" She turned away from him walking towards the door.

"Janet wait!" Rooster yelled out.

"Russo, for Christ sake let her go." Sully was livid.

"We never had SEX!"

"What?" Eddie growled

"What did you say?" Janet spun around.

"We never had sex Janet. We were kissing and naked but before we… you started to cry and you said that you didn't want me…" Rooster sounded so broken "You said you wanted him." He pointed to Eddie who was standing there is total shock the anger building in him " And then you passed out. I stayed, and the next morning, you woke up and just stared at the ceiling and I let you assume… because I was angry…"

"You were angry! Rooster your lie ruined my entire life. I lost the one person, who ever…I lost a baby, I gave up my job my home because your feelings were hurt. You son of a bitch… I hope you rot in hell." Janet turned around again trying to get out of this place that has caused her so much pain.

"Janet wait, don't go." Eddie called out to her.

"This changes nothing Eddie. Nothing…" She ran to him and kissed him one last time before running out of Sully's with Rory trailing behind her. Eddie stood there, empty, aching, angry. He turned around, punched Rooster right in the jaw knocking him to the ground. "Russo, if I were you I would stay as far away from me as possible and Sully as long as he works here you won't see me.

"That's easy Eddie, Rooster you're fired."

"J are you OK?" Rory was worried.

"Yeah, just drive supermodel, I can't wait to see the Ridge in my rear view mirror." Janet said as brushed away a final tear.


	5. Chapter 5

Sixteen Months Later…

The Ridge looked exactly the same as she had left it. Locked in time, frozen in amber. But everything was different. Janet and Rory sat in the back of the cab as it drove up October Road, it was mid-spring and the pear and cherry trees were in full bloom, the tulips in town square were a rainbow of red and pink and yellow. Everything was for lack of a better word perfection. This had always been Janet's favorite time of year in Knights Ridge, everything was new and possible. She had ran out of the Ridge a year and a half ago, in the dead of winter, broken and hollow and now she returned to celebrate Hannah and Nick's long awaited wedding. Filled with dread and anticipation, Janet booked the plane tickets from New York to Boston. New York had been so good to her. It was a place to heal, to grow past the fears and insecurities that had held her back most of her life. She felt like she was coming back to the Ridge as a whole person. Rory had proven to be a loyal and life changing friend and Janet was the same for her. They each brought something to each others life that had been missing. They shared a small apartment, Rory worked as a model, sometimes for catalogues, sometimes just her leg or backside depending on the ad but she was making a living as a working model. Janet was still tending bar, only this time it was in a very chic Zagat rated restaurant, and she loved it. Getting to experiment with different drinks pairing them with the food, she really found something that fulfilled her. And then there was Brett, her not quite boyfriend, her first and an ever present figure in her life, and despite his arrogance, his frat-boy personality and his inability to commit he was always there for Janet when it really mattered.

"Hellllooo," Janet sang into the phone.

"Hey baby cakes, how was the flight?" Brett knew that Janet hated to fly and wanted to make sure all went well.

"It was good, we just pulled into the Ridge, I will be home in like five minutes. Thanks for upgrading us by the way."

"Nahhh, don't worry about it, I have more miles then I will ever know what to do with. So I am driving up Thursday morning, ok. So stay out of trouble until then," Janet could hear the smirk in his voice.

"I'm gonna try but it is the Ridge after all."

"J, don't let Latekka get to you ok. "

"I know, Brett, I am just…"

"I know babe, but just be strong and let it roll."

"Like water off a duck's ass."

"Exactly. I have to go, I am heading back into my meeting. Call me tonight of you need me."

"I will. I hate you Brett." Neither one wanted to saw that they loved each other, so after a drunken night during a fight I hate you became their term of endearment.

"I hate you too baby."

"You two, I just don't get it." Rory joked as she reapplied her lip gloss. "So Sully's tonight?'

The thought of returning to Sully's sent Janet into a panic. She had seen Hannah and Pizza Girl when they came to New York for Hannah's wedding dress almost a year ago, Owen and Alison have been up to visit twice and Brett showed them all a night on the town. Janet knew that tonight she was going to see Eddie, and Eddie was going to see her.

Janet and Rory pulled into Sully's parking lot a few hours later, it too looked exactly the same. Janet saw Eddie truck in its usual spot and a wave of nausea too her over.

"Are you ok J?"

"No, not really, is to late to go back to New York?" Janet let out a nervous giggle.

"J, listen to me you look amazing, you have great job, you and Brett are still going strong and you live in the greatest city in the world with the greatest roommate in the world. Life is good. Eddie is history. Ok."

"I know, its just so strange being back here after all this time." Doubt stared to creep into Janet's mind. "no you are right Rory, lets do this!"

Janet walked into Sully's with her head held high, Rory right behind her having her back.

"There she is!" Owen yelled across the bar. It ran to Janet and lifted her in a big bear hug.

"Big O! God its great to see you!" Owen put her down and gave her a big peck on the cheek.

"Allison!" Janet squealed. "Oh my god you are huge! When is my godson due? Tomorrow?" After all that Owen and Allison had been through together they were able to find a way back and now they were having a baby, the ultimate tribute to love and commitment.

"Oh I know right, I still have four more months to go. The Rowan men grow them big" Janet lovingly rubbed her hands over Allison's belly. "Ali you look breathtaking."

"Janet so do you." Owen interjected "You look HOT!" Owen embraced Rory "You don't look to shabby you're self."

"JANET!" Hannah yelled and the two girls embraced jumping and screaming! "I can't believe you are here! I am getting MARRIED!"

"NICK!" Nick to gave Janet a huge hug.

"Thank god you are here, maybe now Hannah can relax."

"That's the plan Nicky."

"EMILY!"

"There's my girl!" Now Pizza Girl, Janet and Hannah all embraced and jumped up and down screaming.

"Quiet down, your gonna scare off all my paying customers." Sully yelled from behind the bar. When Janet heard his voice, her eyes filled with tears.

"SULLY!" She ran into his open arms.

"Hey there girly, boy I have missed you!"

"Can't breathe, can's see…" Sully released her from his death grip.

"Wow Janet you look great! New York agrees with you don't it?"

"It looks that way." His voice came from behind her, like haunting dream. She turned to him, his voice pulling her.

"Hey Jem. WOW." Not a day had passed that Eddie had not thought of Janet. She was always on the edge of his thoughts, and a song or a smell could bring her right into the middle of them. And now she stood before him a completely different person. For starters Janet was thin, not an ounce of Janet the Planet to be seen, her hair and makeup were perfect and she had that New York edge about here now, she was just in jeans, a tee and flip flops but it was the entire effect that took Eddie by surprise. He realized that his Janet was long gone.

"Thanks Eddie, back at you." Eddie had not changed a bit, it still looked like sex standing in work boots. He opened his arms to her, she stepped into him and they embraced. One word came into Janet's mind. Home. The group around them was quiet watching what was a perfect quiet moment. Eddie realizing that the embrace was lasting longer then it should have, he pulled away. "Janet, there is someone I would like for you to meet." Eddie stretched his arm back, and a small, brown haired women walked to him, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"This is my fiancée Cassie."

"Hi, Cassie. It's really nice to meet you." She was pretty, and sweet and not at all what Janet was expecting. "Hannah had told me you got engaged. Congrats to you both."

"Oh, you knew." Eddie looked at her trying to get a read on what she was thinking.

"Yeah, good news travels fast you know."

"Uh, Ed are you going to you know…"

"Oh, Sorry Cas, this is Janet Meadows, and this is Rory Dunlop. Actually they are both exes of mine and now they live together in New York."

"Oh, you two are a couple?" Cassie asked raising her eyebrows. She had known about Eddie's reputation and she has also known that he had his heart shattered before they had met and that despite his conquests he had only had two girlfriends both of which stood before her now.

Janet laughed "No, we're just friends" Rory wrapped her arms around Janet suggestively.

"Brett and I keep trying but Janet's so square." Rory and Janet burst into a fit of laughter. "Sorry guys, private joke."

Eddie's mouth dropped, as did Owens's, Nick's and Ikey's.

After Eddie was able to regain his thoughts "So you and Brett are still together?"

"Um, yeah. We are. He's coming up on Thursday for the Jack and Jill stag party?" Eddie just exhaled.

"So two of Eddie's exes in town. I am going to have to pick your brains clean…This one, not so much of a talker." Janet and Rory just nodded and the three girls shared in a laugh.

"You are so in trouble buddy."

"Shut up O."

"So, do we hate Cassie?" Rory asked when the girls had a chance to be alone

"Well, she is nice enough, she goes to the Duf wants to be a teacher." Hannah offered. She nice to Sam, she drinks white wine, she has a cat!"

"She hates me and Phil."

"I am sure that's not true Pizza Girl"

"Janet you have no idea, she is not rude or anything just I don't know. She avoids 32 Gelson like the plague, she never comes to Sully's, she is just here tonight because she knew you were coming."

"We were all shocked shitless when Eddie told us he proposed." Allison added. "It was so left field"

"Well he seems… happy… or at least not sad…"Janet was trying to see the bright side.

"I think we hate her." Rory joked raising her glass. Everyone else joined and they clinked them together laughing.

"Wow Eddie, Janet looks, crazy hot."

"Thanks O. Thanks. I hadn't noticed." Eddie grimaced.

"New York does a body good" Ikey added.

"I always thought that she was…" Eddie stopped himself.

"Hey baby, can we get going. I am beat and I still have a paper to finish. I am in the middle of finals after all." Cassie plopped on his lap giving him a long kiss.

"Sure baby, lets go."

Eddie got up to leave and waved to Janet's table.

"Don't forget band practice is 2:30 tomorrow buddy." Cassie grimaced and Eddie just ignored her.

"See you guys then."

Janet was a ball over nerves and anxiety when she woke up the next morning, she needed to be alone and clear her head. She pulled on her sweats and running shoes and made her way out her front door, it was a perfect morning and the run would do her good. She stretched and set her watch and stared was would be at least a six mile run. She made her way out of town, three miles from her front door, running down that long one road stretch when her mind finally went blank. Her solace. When the sky opened up in a down pour, "April showers bring May flowers.' Janet laughed to her self. Soaked through she turned around and stared to make her way back.

When Eddie saw her in the distance, his heart smiled. Having her backing the Ridge felt right. They had left with so many things hanging he was hoping to carve out some time to talk to her alone and he hoped this was it.

"Need a lift?"

"Hey there Eddie! Uh you know what yeah I think I do." Janet jumped into his truck and smiled at him.

"Thanks guy, as usual your timing is perfect.'

"Here, you can dry off with this." He took off his flannel and passed it to her. Just the feel of one his flannels under her finger tips warmed Janet thru and thru. So many amazing memories of removing this particular shirt from Eddie body…

"So you run now?"

"Huh, what… Oh yeah. Rory is like a great influence. She gets me up every morning to go to the gym or to run. She is like my own personal Jillian Michaels." Janet giggled and the sound made Eddies stomach twist, he loved when Janet giggled.

"Well you look…great but I always though you did." Eddie said sheepishly.

"Thanks for saying that Eddie."

"Well its true… So do you want to I don't know go for a ride and catch up?"

"Um, Ok… I would like that but I have to be back for band practice."

"You're going to band practice?"

"Yeah, the boys invited me last night after you left, Hannah and Emily are coming too." Eddie just laughed

"Dorks."

"Yup, the best dorks." Eddie smiled. Janet got it. She knew how important those Dorks were.

"So Cassie, she seems really sweet." for a few minutes Eddie had forgotten all about Cassie.

"Yeah she really is, she is good for me."

"I am really excited for you Eddie you deserve to be happy, how did you guys meet?"

"Um, Murph's. I got her chicken club she got my meatball sub and the rest is history."

"Fate has a funny way of stepping in you know." Eddie turned on to Springbay Road, it was a long curvy stretch and the trees were so dense that it made a leave tunnel.

"Oh god I love this road this time of year."

"Yeah, I remember. We had many a fun time not to far from here." Janet blushed.

"Yes, yes we did. But I had fun times here long before you." Janet smirked when Eddie's face dropped, now it was his turn to blush.

"You and Brett?"

"Yup, I lost my virginity right up there." Janet pointed to a clearing of trees.

"I always wondered how you too ended up together. I could never work it out in my head."

"Oh that's a long story, too long for today." Janet waved him off.

"So, there was something I wanted to talk to you about. I was glad I ran into today actually." Eddie cleared his throat. "I feel like there is some unfinished business between us and I don't want it to you know spoil the week." Janet knew what Eddie was talking about and she had hoped to avoid this conversation but here it was and there was no hiding from it.

"Rooster?" She hadn't said his name in months and it soured in he mouth

"Rooster." Eddie said through gritted teeth.

"I don't really know what to say Eddie. I mean it was so long ago. At the time it was a huge weight of that I never had sex with him. You have no idea how great that felt to know. But it didn't really change anything at the end of the day."

"I know, I just wanted to tell you that I was sorry. I am just… sorry." Eddie put his hand over hers.

"I am sorry too."

"I have really missed you Jem, just talking to you."

"I have missed you too Eddie. But look were are here now, and its not nearly as awful as I thought it would be."

"Gee thanks,"

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I do."

"So friends?"

"Friends."

They drove in silence for a while and Eddie pulled up to Janet's house.

"Ok, this was good, Janet. I'll see you at band practice.

"See you later.."

"What was that?" Rory saw Eddie drop Janet off and she was hoping for a juicy story.

"Nothing, I went for a run and got caught in the ran, he just picked me up."

"You do know that you can see right thru you shirt right?"

"What?" Janet ran to a mirror. "Holy Shit!"

Eddie was wound up like a drum, to have Janet so close to him, soaking wet, her face free of makeup, just Janet the way she was intended, and her shirt and sports bra practically see through. He could hardly stand the tightening in his jeans "Great, friends… why did you pick her up Jackass. Just think about Cassie. FUUUCKKK!" Eddie muttered to himself as he drove away.

Janet walked up the steps to 32 Gelson, and a million memories kept flooding back to her. It almost took her breath away. The hardest to remember was what it felt like watching Eddie kiss Rory on the porch swing. She ran her hands over it, it felt like a life time ago but it somehow still felt like yesterday. A tear formed in her eye. "Get your shit together Meadows" She said to her self and she quickly whipped it away. She walked thru the front door and heard the familiar sounds of her friends bickering about random nothings.

"JANET!" Phil called out to her, he gave her a hug and as much as she tried to hold back she started to cry.

"Phil, I think I have missed you most of all." Janet felt silly and the boys all feigned mock pain that she just professed that Phil was her favorite.

"I missed you to Janet, you have no idea how much. Come, you must tell these newts that there is no way that Luke Skywalker could beat Hans Solo in a caged death match…" Janet Laughed.

"Hell to the NO." Janet yelled out to the room "Hans Solo with wipe the floor with Luke."

"See I told you…"

The group all sat around for hours, dinking beers and catching up.

"Gosh Janet it feels like you never ever left." Pizza Girl cooed.

"I know, its like crazy, here you are like you always were."

"Well put Ikey." joked Owen.

"It is really good to have you back Janet." Eddie looked at her, and raised his beer before he took a sip.

"Thanks Eddie, It's really good to be back."

"Where is Rory today?'

"She went to lunch with her mom."

"Ok guys,' Phil Announced. " Lets get down to business, You know I am not going to be able to make it to the wedding so I wanted to give you guys a little present in the form of a song. So this goes out to Hannah and Nick. Owen, Ikey, Emily if you would please join me."

"Emily you are playing in the band?" Janet was stunned.

'It's a one time only thing Janet, for Hannah and Nick." They all took their places, in front of the mic stands and Pizza Girl was standing in Phil's usual position. She was going to be singing lead and when she grasped the harmonica in her hand Hannah, Nick and Janet knew exactly what song they were about to sing.

"Janet.." Hannah choked out grabbing Nick's hand.

The opening three guitar strums confirmed their theory and Alanis Morrissette's voice filled the room.

"If I had a dollar for every time you made me listen to this song Hannah." This was Nick and Hannah's when they were teenagers, they had danced to it once at the lake and it just stuck. Hannah spent the whole summer playing it over and over again.

_I had no choice but to hear youYou stated your case time and againI thought about itYou treat me like I'm a princessI'm not used to liking thatYou ask how my day was_

Janet looked over at Eddie, he was sitting back on the sofa, relaxed smiling at his friends. The lyric caused Janet to stop and think … _You treat me like a princess… I'm not used to liking that.. _She smiled at him and he caught her, she blushed slightly but neither broke away.

_You've already won me over in spite of meAnd don't be alarmed if I fall head over feetDon't be surprised if I love you for all that you areI couldn't help itIt's all your fault_

Nick stood and extended his hand to Hannah, she took it and jumped off the sofa into his arms and they dancing together, twirling around the room laughing. Eddie and Janet looked on, it was hard not to smile and be happy with so much love in one room. _Your love is thick and it swallowed me wholeYou're so much braver than I gave you credit forThat's not lip serviceYou've already won me over in spite of meAnd don't be alarmed if I fall head over feetDon't be surprised if I love you for all that you areI couldn't help itIt's all your faultYou are the bearer of unconditional thingsYou held your breath and the door for meThanks for your patience_

Eddie finally worked up the nerve, he stood slowly and reached out his hand to Janet. She resisted grabbing it, instead she slowly placed in in his and he pulled her off the sofa and into his arm. She felt so small to him, as he wrapped his arms around her and they swayed to the music. He rested his chin on the top of her head and they both relaxed together. Just her smell was a tonic to him, a soothing elixir, he felt strong and centered when she was in his arms. _You're my best friend…Best friend with benefits…What took me so longYou're the best listener that I've ever metYou're my best friendBest friend with benefitsWhat took me so long_

Eddie spun Janet around causing her to laugh out loud and Eddie joined in. He pulled her in again and Janet rested her hand on his rock solid chest, being this close to him sent a jolt right to Janet's core. A feeling that she had forgotten was even possible fully clothed in a crowded room, but Eddie had always done that to her.

_I've never felt this healthy beforeI've never wanted something rationalI am aware nowI am aware nowYou've already won me over in spite of meAnd don't be alarmed if I fall head over feetDon't be surprised if I love you for all that you areI couldn't help itIt's all your fault_

The song was finally over, and the room filled with cheers and applause.

"You really killed it on the harmonic Emily." Janet Shouted.

"Thank you thank you." Pizza Girl took a bow.

"That was great guys, thank you. Hannah we have to make sure the DJ plays that on Saturday." Nick gave Hannah and slow deep kiss.

"Ok I think its time to go." Owen Joked.

"Janet stay for a few, we need to catch up." Pizza girl asked.

"Sounds good." They group said there good buys and Pizza Girl dragged Janet into the kitchen.

"Well Eddie, that was something?"

"What?" Eddie really had no idea what Phil was talking about.

"Uhhh you and Janet, Dancing. That was… Wow… I forgot how well you guys… fit.. Together. I guess."

"Phil, it was just a dance, we decided to be friends. And I have Cassie and she is with Brett." He hated even saying his name.

"Well if that's how friends dance, I would love to see how lovers dance cause that was hot."

"Stick a cork in it Phiz." Eddie knew that Phil was right, the whole time Eddie was dancing with Janet he just wanted to drag her upstairs and make love to her. It was an urge he had fought since is saw her in Sully's and he wasn't sure how he was going to deal with for the next seven days.

"Hot, Hot, Hot." Pizza Girl taunted

"What, what, what?"

"You and Eddie dancing, wow."

"It was just a dance, Emily, seriously he is engaged. It's not like that we are trying to be… friends…"

"MmmmmHmmmm sure friends, do you want an ice cream sundae?"

"Sure… And wipe that smirk off your face."

"Janet?" Eddie poked his head into the kitchen, he walked in just in time to watch Janet lick whipped cream off her thumb. "I need to stop by the shop do you want a ride home?"

"Yes, please." Janet stood up, and took one more spoonful of her ice cream. She gave Emily a hug. "I'll see you tomorrow, dress fitting. BEHAVE" Pizza Girl gave a mock innocent look and batted her eyelashes.

Eddie and Janet pulled up to her house. They sat there for moment before Eddie finally spoke.

"This was really fun today Jem." His voice was soft and melodic.

"Yeah, it really was, like old times. Only better in away because all the drama has… you know… disappeared."

"Yeah…" As much as Eddie tried he couldn't squash the desire to kiss her. He imagined the ice cream still on her lips and he wanted to taste her again. Before he could think he grabbed her to him, Janet was stunned and before she could react his lips were on her. His hot familiar mouth, touching hers, she parted her lips for him and he slid his tongue across hers, every part of her body ached for him. Every memory that she had tried to suppress, every feeling bubbled up to the surface as she laced her fingers in his hair. Eddie felt whole, that was the only way to describe it, whole and full and happy. He wanted more of her so much more. But as quickly as their kiss had started it ended. Janet pulled away and pushed Eddie backwards.

"Eddie, NO. STOP" She was breathless. "I won't do this. We have been here before. Only this time. I am the Rory, Cassie is the Janet and YOU are still YOU not knowing what the FUCK you want. I guess some things never do change." Janet whipped away a tear.

"Janet, this is not like THAT." He was so confused and her words cut him like a straight razor.

"ENOUGH, this is JUST like that. Maybe this friends thing is too much to hope for. Maybe there is just too much between us. Good night Eddie." Janet jumped out of his truck and ran into her front door slamming it behind her.


	6. Chapter 6

Hey Guys, thanks for reading and reviewing. Again I know you are not loving Brett/Janet and Eddie/Cassie but I have been listening to a lot of Adele lately and am feeling very angst but this is all leading up to a moment I have had planned from the very beginning. A few more chapters to go…This chapter is about why Janet is so insecure and why she had so many trust issues. The show never really got into her back story.

God it felt good to slam the door, the nerve of Eddie to kiss her like that. Who did he think he was. Sure it felt good, it almost felt right but he asked another woman to be his wife after eight months of dating. They had dated for nearly that long and she couldn't even get an I love you out of him. Flustered Janet made her way to the kitchen, thank god for Hannah she had stocked it with a few of Janet's favorite things: Beer, cheese puffs and red vines. Taking one of each, Janet sat on her sofa and cracked into the bag of cheese puffs shoving two into her mouth.

"Oh my Christ these are so effing good..." Janet turned on the TV, looking for a distraction, massive fail. Her mind kept drifting back to him. Why was it so hard just to talk to him, why had it always been so difficult to listen. She had replayed their entire relationship over in her head, trying to figure out why everything went wrong and how Eddie could be engaged now. "Hey J I am back..." a shocked look flashed across Rory's face, Janet was surrounded by three empty beer bottles, a half eaten bag of cheese puffs and was wrapping a red vine around her finger "What happened here?""Eddie kissed me is what happened." Janet said flatly"EDDIE WHAT! What did you do." Rory was hoping for something like this to happen."Oh me, I kissed him back, then I yelled at him then I ran away and then I did this." Janet waved her hands over the carnage."Wow, so much for just friends... Like that was ever possible anyway. Do you want to talk about it?" "Honestly I don't. How was lunch with your mom?""Awful."

"Hey Allison, I am sorry to bug you but can I talk to Owen for a minute?" Eddie drove around for a bit after kissing Janet, he felt lost and he went to the one person who might be able to help.

"Hey buddy, what goes on?"

"I kissed Janet, that's what goes on."

"To be honest with you Eddie, it was just a matter of time. I mean I don't condone the cheating on your fiancée part." Eddie cringed "But you and Janet are this years Nick and Hannah. Fighting like hell what you are feeling. Janet is your Angela Eddie, always has been always will be. Don't get me wrong Cassie, she is great sweet funny and she loves you but she ain't the one."

"Janet doesn't want me O, if she did we wouldn't be here in the first place. I had to move on."

"Eddie, Janet wants you, god you must be blind. She is just scared you two really fucked it up last time. But you cant string Cassie along either."

Eddie left Owen feeling no better, Cassie had been there for him after Janet left, she showed him that he could return to the living and not just screw whatever passed by, she deserved happiness she deserved a faithful man in body and mind.

Hours later Janet was still worked up, she felt anger, regret, guilt. She wanted to talk to Eddie, really talk to him but she wasn't sure if she should. When she slipped out of her house a little after eleven, she tried to convince herself it was just to go for a walk to clear her head. But fifteen minutes later she was standing on the porch at 32 Gelson. She didn't knock, she just opened the door and walked in. Pizza Girl and Phil were asleep on the sofa, like usual The soft glow from the TV illuminating their peaceful faces. It was nice that some things really didn't change. She tip toed up the stairs and stood in front of Eddie's room, she knocked softly and he said come in. He was lying in his bed, legs stretched, hands folded behind his head. His face lit up when he saw here standing in his doorway, again memories came flooding back to him. "Janet? What are you doing here?""I felt bad for how I left before. I think I overreacted and I just needed to talk to you." Eddie sat up and waved her over to sit next to him. "You know we never really talked when we were together, we bantered, we joked, we argued but talking not so much. Even when we were friends it was all fluff." Eddie nodded in agreement. Janet sat Indian style on his bed, directly in from of him. "I want to tell you a story, It's something that I have never told anyone, not even Hannah but I think you need to hear it because...It might help you understand why I was how I was when we were together." Janet wasn't sure if she should go on, she was going down a road that was unfamiliar. Eddie placed his hands on top of hers. "Janet, tell me." Janet took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "My mom, she grew up here in the Ridge, in the same house that I live in now. She went to college in Boston and met my dad. They got married and had me and everyone assumed that life was good. But the truth is… my dad…was a raging alcoholic and I don't have a single sober memory of him, not a single one." Janet was choosing her words very carefully trying to not let her emotions get the best of her. "He used to beat my mom and me too." Janet couldn't look Eddie in the eye, and she kept wringing her hands as she spoke. Eddie's entire body tensed, the thought of anyone lifting a hand to Janet. He had seen pictures of her as a child. She was a sweet curly headed beautiful girl, he didn't want imagine that little girl hiding or crying in pain. "When he wasn't hitting me he was telling me I was useless or ugly or a million other hateful things. And it became my normal. You know it's amazing what you can get used to. I always tried to do what ever I could to keep him happy but I never could for long." Janet's voice trailed off and for several moments she was lost in thought. Eddie felt like he was getting a look inside of Janet, like some one had handed him a key and he was finally able to open her up."Why did your mom stay?" "She loved him... more then she loved me... more then she loved herself... and she didn't want people to know the truth. She was a very prideful woman. One night we got a phone call from some bar to come and pick him up. I told my mom just to leave him there but she went anyway. I never saw her again. They got in an accident and she died and my dad well he walked away with two stitches. Two." Janet couldn't stop the tears now. Eddie reached across and wiped them away. "I would always think about her last few minutes, if she was fighting with my dad, distracted. Or maybe he grabbed the wheel. He wouldn't tell me what happened."

"Jem, I am so sorry.""After that my dad just got so much worse, I had just stared my junior year, You know back in Providence I was popular, I played softball, I was varsity Freshman and Sophomore year. I pitched two no hitters and we won state."Eddie was truly surprised "I had no idea… you never said. I mean you always kicked ass when we had the Sully's softball games but...""Yeah I always planned on getting a scholarship but things happened and I was never really the same. A few weeks after my mom died I wanted money for some class trip thing and he wouldn't give me any. We got in this huge fight and he..." Janet had to stop, this was a day she hadn't allowed herself to think about for years. "He what Jem?""He beat the shit out of me, like Matt Lauche grade. Four broken ribs, broken wrist, fingers. bruised kidneys. I was in the hospital for two weeks. My mothers parents, Nana and Pop came down from the Ridge and with Gram and Gramps decided the best thing to do was to get me out of Providence. Word had got around at school what had happened, everyone was talking and my dad ran off, I never saw him again. "So that's why you started mid year like that." "Yeah.""And why you were so quiet and withdrawn.""I guess so." Everything about Janet clicked into place, like a row of falling dominoes. "I used to spend a lot of time alone just walking around the Ridge. I didn't have any friends, except for maybe Rooster. I had known him years before spending summers with Nana and Pop."

"I didn't know that. You used to summer in the Ridge?"

"Yeah for few weeks, each summer. My first kiss was with Rooster, summer after 8th grade. He dared me to do it actually." Janet laughed, it was nice to think of Rooster and not be angry. " So when I first moved here I would just walk around, with my note book and a camera and get lost. I know every road, every shortcut, every secret place the Ridge has to offer. That's how I met Brett, he was home from College, for spring break. He was driving along and saw me coming out of the woods. Asked if I wanted a ride, I was miles away from home. I knew he was Owen's brother. And we just started hanging out, taking, going on long rides. Flipping a coin to see if we should go left or right. He was a jerk even then, but I always knew where I stood with him, you know. I didn't have to guess. If he was thinking something he said it. And I needed that, I guess I still do.""Do you love him?" Janet took a moment before she answered. It was hard to explain what she felt for Brett, all those years of shared history. "No, not like in the way I should or the way I love you... err... loved you." Eddie face fell when she used the past tense.

'No LOVE you. I am being honest. Not the way I love you" Janet couldn't even look Eddie in the eye. Her stomach was in knots but she couldn't pretend that she wasn't feeling what she was feeling. "But I don't know, no one thinks we make sense, Hell we don't think we make sense. I mean he sees other people, I see other people. But when he had chest pains two months ago, I got a call at 2am and I was there with him and when I freak out about one thing or another or when I first got to NY and I was a mess. He took care of me." "And you let him?" Janet nodded "You never really let me take care of you, not really." "I know and I am sorry, I just didn't know how. And you never really let me in Eddie. Not really. I never knew what you were thinking or feeling. I was always guessing, I felt like I needed a decoder ring. Even now, I cant figure out where your head is at. I mean you're engaged to a girl you have been dating for eight months. When Hannah told me I was beyond shocked. How can you be engaged to her so quickly when you couldn't tell me you loved me? ""I just thought you knew. I had never told anyone that I loved them and meant it before. I don't know I just was scared of losing you. And scared of needing you as much as I did. So I kept you at a distance sometimes. And what I feared happened. I lost you. When you first left Jem I was having a real hard time. It was a good six months before I could do anything really. I was drawn to Callie because she reminded me of you. She was funny and sweet and she wasn't trying to impress me she just was you know easy. She was not impressed by the Hail Eddie thing and she spoke her mind and…""And she is very beautiful.""Yes she is. And so are you Jem." Janet cringed. "Janet you must see that now how beautiful you are.""You know Eddie. You lose 30 pounds and the world sees you differently but I still have to lose the 30 years of snakes in my head."Eddie nodded trying to understand how it must feel to be beaten down your whole life and try and see yourself on s positive light. "The night I proposed was at Nick and Hannah's engagement party. You were suppose to come but then didn't. I was amped up all week wanting to see you and then you didn't show I felt like I was a live wire. And then Owen and Allison just announced they were having a baby and Callie and I were drinking and dancing and I don't know it just happened and she said yes. I love her Janet I do, but I don't crave her or need her the way I do you. I just can't explain it. Seeing you again. I can't pretend. Janet you are the love of my life."

"Eddie, you are the love of mine."

"So why are we apart Janet? WHY?"

"Because we made so many mistakes, we were at such a disadvantage… neither one of us ever really being in a relationship, we fell into every pothole, every sand trap."

"Yup me made a huge mess."

"And then I ran…"

"And then you ran." Eddie whispered. "Maybe if you would have stayed or maybe if I hadn't waited so long…To forgive you." Janet's eyes widened.

"Have you forgiven me, really?" Eddie looked at Janet, really looked at her. Gone was the anger and hate and disappointment.

"Yes Jem, I have. But have you forgiven yourself?"

"I am not sure, I hope so." Janet smiled the smallest of smiles and a tear slowly fell from her cheek. "Look, it's late. We have talked more tonight then the entire time we were together." Janet gigged nervously as she stood to leave. Eddie stood with her and wrapped her arms around her. "I don't know Eddie, there are no easy answers."

"No, no there are not." Eddie rested his chin on her head. "I miss you so much. I didn't really understand how much until you came back." Janet tightened her arms around him.

"I should go Eddie, before this goes down a road that neither one of us want." Janet pulled away and Eddie released her. He smiled knowing what she meant.

"Are you going to Sam's game Wednesday?"

"I wouldn't miss it, I am going to be the crazy lady screaming up front with the crazy blond next to her."

"Ok, good I will see you there."

Janet left feeling better but still sad, they had really resolved nothing but at least they got to talk. Just as Janet crawled into bed for the night her cell phone rang.

"Hey you…"

"Hey Brett."

"You don't sound good J what's wrong? "

"Brett, this is just so… hard… being here." Janet Started to cry. "Now I know why Nick stayed away for ten years this has been fucking brutal. I met Eddie's fiancée Cassie and she is really sweet and perfect and then today Eddie kissed me and…"

"He kissed you huh, I knew that was coming J you had to have too."

"I really didn't, I mean really. Fuck, I just don't know what's up or down anymore."

"Yes you do, Knights Ridge is up and New York is down."

"Very funny, Jerk."

"What are you doing tomorrow?"

"Um, it's a girls day, last dress fitting, manis and pedis and then we are going to the Flats for dinner. Why?"

"Ok, I will finish up all my work tomorrow and will drive up Wednesday instead."

"REALLY?"

"Yes really. You need some backup."

"You know you're the best right."

"Yes, I know."

Eddie was sitting in the bleachers, Cassie tucked under his arm when he saw Janet and Brett make their way on to the field. Hannah and Nick said their hellos and Eddie wondered why Brett had gotten there a day early.

"Edward Arthur Latekka."

"Bad Boy Brett. I wish I could say it's good to see you but it never is." Eddie and Brett both laughed.

"Hey Cassie, Hannah and I are going to watch from the sidelines if you want to join us. We can yell at the ref better from over there." Janet wanted to make an effort to include her. Cassie was surprised, cracking into Eddie tight knit group had been hard for her and she was happy for the open invite in.

"Yeah, that would be great thanks" Eddie nodded to Janet a small thank you and Brett took Cassie's place in the bleachers.

"So Cassie, Hannah says you are going to be a teacher?" Janet was trying to get to know her.

"Uh, yeah. I am in my final year, right now its finals and I am losing my mind."

"Oy, I remember finals. Sucked." Cassie and Janet shared a nervous laugh. " So you are from Boston right?"

"Yeah, born and raised." _Come on Cassie help me out, ask me something…_

"I'm sorry Janet, you make me kind of nervous. All I have heard for months is about Janet and Eddie and here you are. I feel like I cant be myself."

"I know what you mean actually, when Rory came back to town I felt the same way but now she is my BFF."

"Hey!" Hannah shouted

"Ok sorry, my 2nd BFF." Janet wrapped her arm around Hannah's shoulder. "I'm just saying we all have history, isn't that right Hannah?"

"We're a tight little incestuous group…" Hannah giggled.

"But once you're in you're in" Janet finished. Cassie smiled and tried to relax.

The girls watched the game clapping, yelling and chest bumping, Sam was quite the short stop and his team was in the lead for the entire game. Eddie watched Janet and Cassie but mostly Janet and Brett watched Eddie watching her.

"Eddie, come and walk with me for a minute."

"Jesus Brett, really."

"Yeah, really." Eddie followed Brett closer to the fence by the parking lot. He crossed his arms across his chest.

"Ok, Brett say what you need to say." Eddie figured Janet had told him about the kiss and he was about to hear it.

"You know, I love Janet. I would never tell her that because that's not what we do. But I love her. But I know I can't really give her what she needs, maybe what she think she wants… but what she needs, only you can do that Eddie. I am sitting here watching you watch Janet and thinking that poor girl wearing your ring, does she know. I mean she's not dumb so she must see it. We all see it for Christ's sake. No one thinks you're actually going to marry her. Except for maybe Janet." Eddie was shocked into silence. "I waited for you to come for her, every month that passed… I expected it but you never did. So I am giving you one shot Eddie, ONE. And if you fuck this up, I am going to take her back to New York and I swear I am going to marry her and try to make her happy."

"What are you saying Brett?" The stones that Brett had telling him about Janet and Cassie.

"I am saying cut the shit, let Cassie off the hook, tell Janet how you feel and get your head out of your ass. Was that clear enough for you. You didn't see her when she first got to NY, you have no idea." Brett's voice trailed off and a pained look flashed across his face "If you do that to her again, nothing will be able to save you from me. NOTHING." Eddie realized in the moment how much Brett really cared for Janet, loved her even. And he loved her enough to give her what she needed. Brett left Eddie standing there and went back to Janet wrapping his arms around her from behind. While he still could…

Cassie had been keeping a close eye on Eddie since Janet had gotten back into town. For weeks all anyone would talk about was Janet's impending return to the Ridge. Eddie always became silent and sullen when her name was brought up. She had asked him ten of times what happed with Janet, but all he would say is that they broke each others hearts and she had to leave. Over time she had gotten bits and pieces but the more she knew the less she wanted to know. Janet had seeped into to every part of Eddies life, Sully's, his house, the shop. She would find things, notes, photos, bits and pieces of memories scattered like breadcrumbs in Eddie life. It got to the point where she just couldn't go anymore, to the house on Gelson, Sully's, it was to hard being surrounded by a ghost. But today at Sam's softball game everything came into focus. Eddie sat on the bleachers, watching Janet. He watched her laugh, pull her hair up, tie her shoe. He smiled, this small content smile and his eyes were bright. Cassie realized that he never looked like that around her. Not once in all the time they had been together. She knew it was coming, they sat in her apartment that night, and his mind was off, deep in thought like he was fighting a battle that had no winner.

"Ed, look at me." Eddie looked up from the TV that he was pretending to watch.

"Yeah Cas?"

"Just say it please, I know its coming. Its written all over your face."

"Cassie, what are you talking about?"

"Ed, you and Janet, I see how you look at her and how she tries to not look at you. I hear all the whispers, I saw you and Brett in a heated conversation today. Look. Ed…"

"Cassie, I gave my heart away a long time ago, and I thought I had it back. I really did. I never would have…"

"I know."

"But now that she is here, I can't let her go again. I am so very sorry. This is so unfair to you, you have been amazing. But…"

"But she is the love of your life." Once the tears started Eddie felt like a son of a bitch, he wanted her to yell or throw something. But instead she just stood there strong, understanding and crying.

"Ed, could you go."

" I can't until I know you are ok."

"I am, when we met I thought this will be fun, I heard all the stories. And when we got serious I always knew it was going to end, even when you asked me to marry you I never really saw us ever walking down the aisle. Did you?" Eddie shook his head no. "See, the lucky thing for me is… you're not the love of my life either."

"Brett, what's going on you seem off tonight." They were are their way back to Janet's from the baseball game. Brett who was usually vibrant and talkative, was almost sullen, pensive. "Are you OK?" Janet asked rubbing her hand across his broad shoulder.

"I am fine J, its fine." The rest of the ride was in complete silence. They pulled into Janet's drive way, she leaned in a gave Brett a peck on the cheek.

"Thank you for coming early, I almost kinda missed you." Her words went right through him. "You want to order some Pizza for dinner tonight, I really don't have energy for much else."

"You know what J I think I am going to crash at O's tonight."

"What? Why?"

"I think you know why, It was a mistake coming here."

"Brett..."

"You love him J, its plain to see. You don't really want me tonight. And I don't want to be what you wake up regretting tomorrow. I would hope that in all these years you never woke up and regret me, and I think tomorrow you would."

"Brett, its not like that, really. Is this because I told you we kissed. He is engaged."

"Not for long Janet, trust me I know. Come on don't make this any harder, out you go." He gave her one, lingering kiss on the lips. "I hate you." He whispered before he ushered her out of his car.

Janet was stunned, did Brett just breakup with her? Where they ever really together. This had been the most confusing few days of her life, everything was changing. Janet stormed into her front door and threw her purse on the floor.

"Rory, you wanna go to Sully's and get shit faced?" Rory looked up from the sofa.

"Hell yeah I do."

Janet picked up her cell and Called Hannah and Pizza Girl, asked the same question and got the same answer. Twenty minutes later the foursome was seated at a high-top table, on their second shot.

"I saw Ray this morning." Janet announced "In town, we had coffee."

"Really how was that?" Hannah asked her stomach twisting.

"He asked about you actually."

"I am sure he did."

"He wanted to know if you were happy, how Sam was. It was actually ok. We would speak from time to time, he was watching my house while I was gone. After the wedding that shall not be named we had an understanding of sorts."

"He's back with Christine right?"

"Yes, and she is already making him miserable." They all shared in a laugh "He said that Matt is getting out of jail in a few weeks, that was a quick year."

"Wow, already. Does Eddie know." Pizza Girl asked pouring another round of shots.

""I am not sure, tell him when you see him OK."

"Tell Eddie what?" His voice came from behind her and Janet jumped.

"Hey Eddie." Rory and Pizza Girl said in unison.

"Tell Eddie what?" he asked again

"Uh.. Matt Lauche is getting out of the clink in a few weeks." Pizza Girl answered.

"Yeah, I got a letter. Mind if I join you ladies." Eddie pulled up a stool and sat right next to Janet. "So what brought you all out here this late?"

"Janet wanted to get shit faced." Rory offered.

"Miss Meadows, I am shocked and appalled." Eddie poured a shot in her glass and drank it never taking his eyes off of her. "Where is Bad Boy tonight?" he asked pouring another shot.

"Owen's" Janet grabbed the shot before Eddie could and drank it.

"Cassie?"

"Cassie... she is back at her apartment. We broke up actually." All the girls at the table gasped. Janet sat there her face like stone, successfully masking the wealth of emotions she was feeling.

"You what?" Pizza girl asked unable to hide her excitement. Rory grabbed Janet's knee under the table.

"We broke up."

"Why?" Rory asked trying to get a read on Janet.

"She didn't like the fact that I was in love with someone else." Eddie and Janet didn't take their eyes off each other. Janet let a small smile escape and Eddie took it as an invitation. Before he could second guess himself he put his hand on the back of Janet's neck and pulled her into him. His lips on hers, finally with no guilt or worry. He wrapped his arms around her pulling her close, his mouth finally where it was always meant to be. Janet surrendered to him, she could no longer deny herself.

"Ok ladies I think that's our cue." Hannah announced standing "Let's go to the bar." The girls trotted away giddy.

There kiss was all consuming, his hot mouth exploring hers, every breath, the way his stubble felts against her skin, his hand tightening around her waist. Eddie finally broke away realizing they were in a very public place. "We should go." Janet Just nodded. Eddie took her hand and lead her out of Sully's to his truck. He pushed her against it, the cold metal on her back and kissed her again his mouth never leaving hers, this time he allowed his hands to explore her body that was familiar and yet new all at the same time. Just the feel of her under his hands, her back, her belly, he slid his hands under her shirt and unsnapped her bra, she moaned when his rough hands caressed her aching breasts.

"Janet…" He whispered her name over and over again. "We should go." She looked up at him and smiled. Eddie cocked his head slightly. "Springbay Road?" They both said in unison…


	7. Chapter 7

Eddie pulled on to the road, the moonlight peeked through the dense cover of leaves and they drove in a comfortable silence. Eddie had his hand laced in Janet's, her other hand gently stroking the back of his neck. Eddie pulled off to what they had considered to be their spot. The first time Janet had brought him there for his birthday, a gift and a surprise and a very happy memory. The anticipation was building and as soon as the car was parked, Eddie pulled Janet in for a kiss, their lips were mere inches apart and all Eddie could do was look at her. It had given up hope long ago that they could be together again, he had tried to move on even settle, but now here they were… finally.

"Janet, I love you baby. So much." His hot breath tickled her nose.

"I love you too, I can't even believe we are here." Eddie took her mouth finally, a deep long kiss, full of everything that the last sixteen months had taken from them. His tongue eliciting moans from Janet that came deep from her soul. He finally broke away from her, they were both panting.

"Inside or outside Jem?" Janet smiled a wicked smile and weighed her options. "Its not too cold, outside I think."

Eddie smiled and reached behind his seat pulling out the wool blanket he had always kept there for Janet when they would plow the streets of Knight's Ridge together. For a moment Janet wondered if he had every used this blanket with Cassie and as if her read her mind or the quick look of concern that flashed across his face.

"Jem, I never took Cassie plowing with me, this had been here waiting for you." He gave her a quick peck and eagerly opened his door, Janet following suit. He laid the blanket out on the flat bed of his truck and helped Janet up. They stood there in each others arms as Eddie gently kissed Janet's neck. Janet raised her arms over her head and Eddie removed her t-shirt, her bra long gone. The cool night air pricked her skin, but then the sensation of Eddie's warm rough hands, and his mouth on her breasts, her belly her back, kept her warm. He dropped to his knees and removed her sneakers and socks and finally he slowly unzipped her jeans, pulling them down around her hips and slowly down her legs. His hands cupped her ass and he slowly began to kiss the line of her panties.

"Eddie." Janet moaned softly before sinking to her knees with him. She unbuttoned his shirt, resisting the urge to tear it off of him, next he lifted his arms over his head and she removed his white t-shirt, the discarded items would later become makeshift pillows. She next pulled on his belt and unzipped his jeans, when he sprung free Eddie took Janet by surprise and flipped her on to her back. He left a trail of kisses down her body until he reached her core and he slowly removed her panties, lifting her legs in the air and resting them around his shoulders. His mouth was finally on her, inside of her, Janet moaned loudly into the night air. For Eddie, her taste and smell was intoxicating and his ever hardening penis felt like he was going to explode.

"Oh my GOD Eddie." Janet came hard and loud. Eddie laughed and Janet joined in. "Jesus baby, do you want us to get caught?" Janet blushed but wouldn't give an inch.

"Wouldn't be the first time would it?" They laughed together again until a concerned look fell across Eddie face. Janet quickly noticed and felt a sting in the pit of her stomach.

"Eddie what's wrong."

"Condoms, I don't have any do you."

"Shit no, you and Cassie didn't..."

"No we did." Eddie was quick to interrupt "You're the only person who I ever didn't use them with... Cassie and I didn't really do the impromptu sex thing." Janet laughed again.

"My poor boy." Eddie smiled

"You and Brett?"

"Every time." Janet was quick to answer and the laughter flowed.

"So do you want to go back to the house..." Eddie asked sheepishly

"No, do you?"

"Nope."

"So you're gonna have pull out." A devilish grin passed across Janet's face and Eddie's mouth was on hers once again, tasting herself on his lips she bit his lower lip, Eddie growled in satisfaction.

"You ready Meadows?"

"Show me what you got Latekka" Eddie surged into her and all she could do was hold on and cry out, she wrapped her legs around his waist and pulled him in as close as she could, Eddie eased in and out of her filling her and then leaving a void only to fill her again, she felt perfect beneath him. He wanted to be closer, deeper, he lifted Janet's leg and slightly bent it back towards her body. Janet smiled and guided her leg onto his shoulder. Eddie was slightly shocked.

"Hot Yoga, two days a week, you can thank Rory when you see her." Eddie kissed her knee and pushed into her deeper.

"Hot yoga Huh?" again they were laughing but then the heat and friction grew between and things quickly took a serious turn. Eddie lowered her leg and she wrapped them around his waist locking them tightly, she arched her body and Eddie slipped his hand underneath her, cradling her back lifting he slightly off the truck, with this new angle Janet called out and Eddie kept a strong rhythm.

"Janet, if I don't stop now, I am not going to be able to." Eddie growled in to her ear trying with everything her had to hold back, Janet did not heed his warning, instead she looked him right in the eye and tightened her legs around him.

"Eddie, if you stop now I will kill you." Janet panted between thrusts. Eddie smiled he could feel her tighten around him, he knew she was close when her nails dug in to his back. They were both in it now, the deep spiral where sounds and movements don't matter, only what you feel. They came together, loudly. Janet could feel him empty into her and she quivered around him. Breathless and spent Eddie rolled over on to his side taking Janet with him. There legs tangled together and her head on his sweaty chest. He pulled the blanket around them like a cocoon and they drifted off into a contented sleep

"Jem, baby wake up." The sun was coming up and despite the blanket and their body heat it was cold.

"Mmmm, do I have to." Janet grumbled.

"Yes baby you do, come on." Janet opened her eyes and reached up to kiss Eddie, his grip tightened around her.

"Baby it's cold." A shiver ran through Janet.

"Yes, I know. Let get dressed, head back to my house and we can take a bath before Phil and Pizza Girl get up." A smile flashed across Janet's face.

"You had me at bath."

Eddie filled his old claw foot tub with hot water and a squirt of his body wash for bubbles. Janet quickly stripped and eased herself into the hot water, warming her chilled bones, Eddie eased in behind Janet wrapping his legs and arms around her. They just sat like that until the water started to cool.

"I am so happy to be sitting where I am sitting." Janet said as a tear fell off her cheek remembering what she had said to him on their first date. Eddie leaned down and kissed her shoulder.

" Happy is not a big enough word for it Jem." Janet turned her body to him, her mouth crashing into his. With Eddie help she twisted herself to face him, and as slowly as she could she eased herself down on his hard shaft. Wrapping their arms around each other, they barely moved Janet gently rocked around him, the only sound from the water gently lapping against the tub. Janet came first, so intensely it scared her, she was shaking in Eddie arms tears in her eyes. Eddie quickly followed, a deep loud moan escaping from his lips, Janet used her mouth to try and stifle it. They sat there together for several minutes, neither able to move.

"Jem, that was…"

"I know, I have never…

"Either have I…I think I need to go back to sleep. I am not as young as I used to be." Eddie chuckled into Janet's hair "Can you get up?"

"I am not sure… Can I even feel my legs is the better question." They were both laughing again.

It was almost noon when Janet finally decided she had to leave, Eddie was still asleep. This time she wasn't taking any chances and she shook him awake.

"Mmmmm, Jem lets go back to sleep, he tried to pull her back into his arms."

"Eddie, I can't. I have to go talk to Brett." When Eddie heard his name, he instantly was fully awake "And I have go to Sully's and set up for the Stag Party tonight with PG and I need to go home and get my self all cute for tonight. I have a new dress and everything."

"Cant you just skip over the Brett part?"

"No, Eddie I really can't. I owe him at least a conversation." Eddie grimaced and threw the covers off getting out of bed. He stood in front of Janet naked with his hands on his hips. Janet couldn't help but stare, Eddie smirked.

"Shower." He held his had out to her, she placed hers in his and he pulled her out off the bed into the bathroom laughing the entire way.

Janet pulled up to Owens house, not really sure what she was going to say to Brett. Their relationship was always in such a gray area. She stood on the front porch before knocking, and took a few deeps breaths.

"Hey Janet, what goes on?" Owens voice was slightly cautious.

"Hey O, um is Brett around?" Owen had heard thru the grapevine that was Hannah via Allison that Janet went home with Eddie last night. He knew Brett was in for it.

"Yeah, he's in the kitchen, go on in."

"Hey there J." Brett noticed that she was in the same outfit from yesterday and it shocked him how painful it was to see. "What brings you here?" His voice was too cheerful, spirited, dripping with that fake Brett BS that Janet hated.

"Brett, stop. Please." He knew instantly what she meant. He exhaled and tried to act normal.

"Ok, J. Ok." Janet sat next to him and placed her hands over his.

"I don't really know, what to say to you Brett." He looked at her and smiled.

"I just want you to be happy J, and if I could have given you what you needed trust me Latekka would not have had a chance. But you want marriage and a family and a dog and all that crap. It's just not who I am."

"I know, you know when I was seventeen you were just what I needed and the same thing goes for when I was twenty eight, you have always been there for me. More then anyone has ever been, even Eddie. I know I say that Hannah is my best friend or Rory." Tears slid down Janet's face "But you, you're my best friend. You arrogant, misogynistic, womanizing, caring, loyal, honest asshole. You're my best friend. I could never regret you Brett, not for a second. You have made me, me."

"I love you J. I'm not the mushy flowers and hearts guy. But I love you." Janet was full on crying now.

"I love you too Brett.' He wrapped his arms around her, wishing he could hold her forever.

"You make sure Latekka treats you good, so help me god."

Janet left Brett feeling better, they had some closure. This trip back to the Ridge had really allowed her to close the doors on old ghosts and hopefully she could move forward. There was just one more ghost that she need to face. She knocked on his door only half hoping he would be home. When the door opened, shock flashed across his face. He was shocked that Janet was there in his door way but then she looked so different. He has always thought she was pretty but this new Janet was breathtaking.

"Wow, Janet. I heard you were back in town. I can't believe you are here."

"Hi Rooster, I uh, thought we should talk."

"Would you like to come in?"

"Um. No this will only take a minute." Honesty Janet didn't feel comfortable going into his place alone. Rooster nodded and stepped out on to his front porch with her, closing his door behind him. Janet inhaled sharply before she began "So its been a while and I have had a lot of time to think about what happened and what DIDN'T happen and I wanted to tell you that I am sorry." Sorry was not what Rooster was expecting to hear "You had feelings for me and I was insensitive to them, and that was wrong. What you did, that night and the lie that followed, it destroyed my life. But looking back I could see why you would hate me that much…"

"I didn't hate you Janet, I just wanted you to be mine. I always thought that you and me would end up together. That the first girl I ever kissed would be the last. But you know what I had to dare to kiss me even then."

"Rooster, I am sorry that I did what I did. I hope you can forgive me because I am working like hell to forgive you. I have know you too long to hold on to all this ill will"

"Do you think we could ever be friends again?" She could see the glimmer of hope in his eyes and she didn't want to stoke it but she didn't want to put it out either.

"Look, Eddie and I are trying to be together again, so I am going to be spending more time in the Ridge, maybe in time we can get a drink or something. Down the road."

"You and Eddie, I am happy for you Janet. I hope it works out."

"Thanks Rooster, look I have to go. I have a millions things to do for Nick and Hannah's stag party. It was good talking to you Rooster." Janet was half way down his path, she turned around "Hey Vincent, I like the new haircut." He ran his hand over his head.

"Thanks"

Sully's was filled, everyone who was coming to the wedding has made their way to the stag party. The music was pumping, the beer was flowing and Pizza Girl and Janet had out done themselves with the decorations. The usual suspects were there sans poor pregnant Allison, and Pizza Girl and Janet who were running late after spending hours decorating. Eddie was seated at the bar, on his stool waiting for Janet to arrive. Hannah sat next to him.

"So Eddie, you and Janet looked cozy last night."

"Mmmmhhh." Eddie smiled giving nothing away taking a long sip from his beer.

"Yeah, so if you hurt her in any way, I am going to cut off your balls and auction them off to one of your one night stands." Eddie choked on his beer. "And trust me there will be plenty of interest." Hannah jumped off the stool and made her way back to Nick.

Janet walked in and saw Eddie at the bar, she walked up behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist. His whole body reacted to her. He spun around in the stool and took the site that was Janet in. She was wearing a dress, it was black and short to her mid thigh and had a 20's flapper vibe with a deep v neck and double spaghetti straps, she wore a long thing gold necklace that hung down between her breasts and high black strappy heels. Her hair was in a low bun and tendrils fell around her face. He just stared at her for a minute. "Wow, Jem, WOW. Could you do a little twirl for me?" JAnet smiled and twirled as asked, the back of the dress also had a deep v neck and exposed her back and a red bra strap. Eddie pants tightened across his erection. He pulled her close, she that she was standing between his knees, with him seated and her in heels they were at eye level. He kissed her and she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"The things I am going to do to you later Jem." He whispered in her ear, Janet blushed bright red and she felt a rush straight to her core.

The party was in full swing hours later when the strippers arrived, two girls and one guy. They girls had more fun with it then the guys did, all getting lap dances. Eddie sat back and watched Janet she looked so care free and happy sitting next to Hannah and Rory stuffing dollars bills in some girls g-string laughing. Brett was watching her too, and made his way over to Eddie.

"Amazing how she can still look sweet and innocent in that dress, getting a lap dance and smacking a strippers ass." Eddie laughed and nodded in agreement "You don't know if you should fuck her or protect her, I was lucky to do both… for awhile anyway… Now its your turn." Brett didn't give Eddie the change to respond, he turned and left. Eddie sat there watching for a moment more when a light bulb went off in his head and he made his way to the juke box.

The familiar drum beat caught Janet's attention and then she heard

NIGHT! NIGHT! Janet started to laugh and her eyes darted around looking for Eddie, she found him standing in the doorway of the storage room. She quickly got up and made her way him pulling Eddie in and closing the door behind them.

"Janet you look so fucking hot tonight." He was kissing her mouth her neck her bare shoulders. Janet was unzipping his pants, reached in and grabbed his hard cock. Eddie grunted and bit her ear causing Janet to gasp, he pushed her against the wall, lifter the hem of her dress and yanked her panties to the ground. Before Janet could react, he inserted his finger inside her, feeling her wetness Janet clenched and moaned into his mouth. "Eddie…"

He lifted her up and she wrapped her legs around his waist and he slid into her.

"baby this is going to be quick." He pounded into her, pressing her between his body and the wall. As their song played in the background Janet couldn't help but scream out Eddie's name as she came and Eddie quickly followed stilling inside her. Still holding her, he leaned against the wall, using every last ounce of energy to hold them up. Janet rested her head on his shoulder, kissing what ever exposed skin she could find. Breathless and spent he finally put her down, her legs weak. She looked at him and smiled.

"Pizza Girls not the only one who delivers." She laughed at she said it and Eddie just shook his head. Eddie zipped up and then dropped to his knees and helped Janet as he slid her panties back on. "I will be seeing you again later." He said kissing her at her core and pulling her dress back down. Janet tried her best to fix herself, but it was really no use they both looked freshly fucked. When they finally emerged from the storage closet everyone looked their way and Owen and Ikey had the never to openly applaud. The both laughed and walked over to their group of friends.

"Hey, Rory."

"Yeah Eddie."

"Thanks for the hot yoga classes, worth every penny." Rory's jaw dropped and then she stared to laugh. It took the rest of the crew a few beats to figure out what Eddie meant but the laughter spread as soon as it did. Janet playfully punched Eddie in the shoulder.

"I call shots!" Pizza Girl yelled. Sully brought over a bottle a glasses, and set them up. They all held them up together, Eddie, Janet, Hannah, Nick, Ikey, Owen, Pizza Girl. They clicked them together and finally Eddie said "To what comes next." They all repeated his toast and drank their shots together.


	8. Chapter 8

Eddie and Janet woke up the next morning tangled together in his bed, sore, hung over but happy. He was wrapped around her, his arms locked behind her back, pulling her into his body, her leg slung over his. Eddie was the first to wake, kissing Janet gently she smiled at him, her eyes still closed.

"Good Morning trouble maker." she whispered into his neck, deeply inhaling his scent. Something she had missed, yearned for.

"Back at you baby." He nuzzled her, his hands wandering over her body that was still new to him. Janet's new body looked and felt amazing, but his missed her soft curves and rounded belly.

"Ok, that's enough of that, I need a break. I have earned a break and some breakfast." She giggled as he ticked her bare hip.

"Ok, what are you in the mood for? He asked suggestively

"Food, actual food. The diner maybe or The Happy Donut. Yes, donuts and coffee. Sugar and caffeine. I think we both have earned it." Janet wiggled out from under him, walking naked to the bathroom "Shower?" she questioned, raising an eyebrow. Eddie jumped up running to follow her.

They sat in a booth, on the same side. Something that Janet always found annoying until she herself was in a relationship and then she understood it. The need to be close, to touch, to be touched. With fresh hot donuts and coffee in hand, they sat there together like they had never been apart. He caught her up on BFW, how they were growing every month. Carter Bump had thrown them tons of local business, the library, the middle school, the police station. They were able to hire Ikey and Ronnie full time, had a few local guys as part timers and were still turning a profit. They had a great reputation, despite Ray trying to undercut them and Eddie was even able to get back some of his business from Latekka Landscaping. He loved that he was able to work out doors again. Janet told him all about New York, her apartment and her job, how she was able to really get in the kitchens with the chefs and make drinks to go with the meals. They called her a mixologist not a bartender. She told him how much she loved the city, how there was always something to do or somewhere to go. How everything was possible there. And she and Rory took full advantage of it. They talked about Nick and Hannah and the impending wedding that was just a day away despite everything they had gone through they were finally there. They talked about everything except for the one thing that was on both of there minds, where were they going to go from here. Owen and Allison walked into The Happy Donut with the kids and joined them at their table. Owen was torn, he saw how much pain Brett was in despite how hard he tried to hide it. But in his heart Owen knew that Janet was where she should be. With Eddie.

"So are you guys all ready for the rehearsal dinner tonight?' Owen asked taking a huge bite of his cruller.

"What's to be ready for O. Ro, we stand there and watch and then we eat. I think I can handle that. What about you Meadows?" Eddie out his arm around her shoulders, twisting his finger in her hair.

"I think so, Latekka. I think so." Janet smiled up at him, resting her hand on his knee, sipping her coffee "How are you feeling Allison?"

"Huge!" She answered exasperated. The table laughed.

"Can I get you guys a refill? Alishia, The Happy Donut owner asked holding up a fresh pot of coffee. Eddie and Owen raised their mugs and Alicia poured.

"Hey Alishia, where are you from?"

"Me? New Zealand. I came to the States God, six years ago to go to the Duf and never left. And then I opened this place last year."

"Well we are grateful you did, these donuts rock!" Owen shouted, overly happy about a donut. Alishia smiled, poured some fresh coffee into Janet's cup.

"Good to see you back in the Ridge Janet."

"Its good to be here Alishia" Janet smiled as she lifted her mug to her lips. "I remember you bringing me donuts to Sully's when you were just thinking about opening this place and look at what you've got. Its amazing what a year and a half can do."

"Ain't that the god's honest truth. Well I am off guys, time to make the donuts." They all laughed as she walked away.

"Where are you guys headed after this?" Allison asked rubbing her belly.

"Uh, were going to go for a walk around the park and then go see Hannah and Nick. You guys?"

"Were taking the kids to a movie and then to the sitter."

Eddie and Janet were the first to leave, saying their goodbyes to the Rowans. They started down October Road, hand and hand. Stopping to talk to the townies, as they passed the shops and stores. Eddie would stop every so often to kiss the side of Janet's head or the top of her hand, wrapping his arms around his waist. They happily turned the corner, running right into Cassie walking out of the market with a grocery bag full of food. Cassie saw them before they saw her. She was stunned, watching them together looking so happy, it was so easy between them. She tried to go unseen but Janet looked away from Eddie gaze and locked eyes with her. A flash of pain spread across both their faces. Janet broke away from Eddie's grasp, confusing him, as she walked over to Cassie. Eddie looked up realizing what was happening and hung back giving them both some space."

"Cassie, hey." Janet said softly.

"Hi." Cassie knew that once things were over between her and Eddie he would go straight to Janet but they had just broken up two days ago and he already looks so damn happy, it broke her heart. "Uh, how are you?"

"I'm good. How are you?" Janet asked actually concerned.

"I'm good. Fine." Cassie's had mixed feelings, in one way Janet was the enemy. The girl who came and blew up her life. But on the other hand Janet was not that girl, she didn't come here intending to blow anything up. What Cassie and eddie had was an illusion, and what he and Janet had was the real thing.

"Cassie, come on? This whole thing just fucking sucks. Its ok to say it." Janet felt awful for how Brett and Cassie was the collateral damage of the Janet and Eddie saga.

"Yeah, it does fucking suck. It hurts like hell but it's the right thing." Janet put her hand on Cassie's shoulder.

"Look, I know this is strange, but I really liked you. We all do actually. I would like us to be friends, not like besties but friends. I am going to be spending more time in the Ridge now, so we are going to see each other, it doesn't have to fucking suck. It could just plain old suck." Janet and Cassie both laughed. Eddie watched, relaxing a bit.

"I see it, you know. Why you two belong together. Its so obvious. I had that once, and I let it go."

"Its never too late Cassie, trust me, its never too late. Is it Ok if I call you the next time I am in town?"

"Yeah, that would be nice." The two embraced tentatively and Cassie continued on her way past Eddie.

"Hey Cassie."

"Hey Eddie." They said no more, they only smiled as they passed each other on the street.

Eddie caught up to Janet, looking back at Cassie once more before turning his full attention back to Janet.

"Why don't we skip the park and take a nap before we go to Nick and Hannah's. I am not as young as I used to be and you wore me out last night. " Janet laughed.

"I wore you out huh. Ok lets go take a nap old man."

They walked into the house on Gelson, Phil and Pizza Girl were sitting in the sofa watching Barefoot Contessa make a pesto sauce.

"See Philly, I told you. I can totally use walnuts instead of pine nuts. Jeeze."

"Hey you two. What goes on?" Phil asked happy to see them back together. Eddie threw him a bag of donuts. "Nice, thanks man." Pizza Girl grabbed the bag from Phil, pulling out a Boston Cream, her favorite.

"Thanks Eddie, these are my favorite."

"That's why I got it PG, Janet and I are going to take a nap. Will you wake us in an hour we have to go to Nick and Hannah's."

"Nap?" Phil asked raising his eyebrows "is that code for sex?"

"PHIL!" Pizza Girl shouted slapping him on the shoulder. Janet blushed and Eddie scoffed.

"No Phyz, it mean nap, sleeping." Eddie grabbed Janet's hand leading her up the stairs.

"Philly I cant believe you sometimes"

"What, it was a valid question. I have many a time walked in on Eddie and his company. I think of Janet like a sister, that is the LAST thing I want to see. " He shuddered. "Now, if you use walnuts we cant make this when Nick and Hannah come for dinner."

'He's allergic to peanuts, not walnuts."

"You wanna risk it?"

They laid down together, fully clothed, shoes kicked off on the floor. Eddie on his back like he always slept and Janet tucked into his arm, hand on his chest. They were peaceful and contented together. The drifted off to sleep quickly and when Phil knocked on the door an hour later, it felt like sixty seconds passed not sixty minutes. Phil watched them for a moment, and was struck with a feeling that everything was how it was suppose to be. Like anything and everything was possible if you were willing to fight for it. If you were willing to work for it and in that moment he knew that he had to leave the house and give Emily the life she deserved, the life they deserved. He just wasn't sure how he was going to muster the strength to do it.

Eddie and Janet decided to walk to Nick and Hannah's, actually it was Hannah's house. Nick moved in when they got engaged and Aubrey moved in with Ronnie and the Commander and Leslie. All the pieces were falling into place.

"What goes on?" Eddie yelled out as he walked thru the door not bothering to knock.

"We're in the kitchen." Nick called out. Hannah was standing at the sink, washing tomatoes for the salad she was making, Sam was sitting in the stool reading a book and Nick was at the fridge getting the beers.

"Hey Dad, get me a juice box."

"Please?"

"Please." Sam said dripping with thirteen year old sarcasm. 'And how are my two favorite Star crossed lovers doing today?" Sam asked looking at Janet and Eddie

"I thought you mom and dad were your favorite star crossed lovers Rockstar?" Janet replied matching his tone.

"Cut the crap Sam." Nick said handing him the juice box. "Hey guys, you hungry?" He handed out the beers. Eddie sat next to Sam on the stool, pulling Janet against of him.

"I am always hungry." Eddie took a long swing from his beer.

"Ain't that the truth." Janet mumbled over her bottle of beer. Eddie chuckled, understanding what she meant.

"I got steaks, I am going to throw them on the grill, think you can pull yourself away from Janet long enough to help me?" Eddie patted Janet in her thigh, urging her off his lap, making his way towards Nick. "Come on Sam, you too."

"Nahh, I am going to go watch the game in my room, call me for dinner."

"Ok Janet, details… go!"

"Hannah, I don't know, its all happened so quick but I feel like I never left, like all this time hadn't passed. I mean Eddie and me together, its perfect."

"Perfect?"

"Yeah, perfect. Until we ran into Cassie on O Road today."

"Ouch, that was bound to happen." Hannah put the lettuce in the salad spinner as Janet chopped the tomatoes.

"Yeah, but so soon, it's been two days. I felt like shit. She was so nice, I would like to try and be her friend. I mean I am going to be in the Ridge more, we are bound to see each other."

"Wait, you are not moving back here?"

"I don't know, I mean right now I have a lease, and I love my job. And things with me and Eddie are so new, old but still new. So no, I am not moving back right away. I am happy in New York."

"So man, you and Janet back together. How goes that?' Nick asked throwing the steaks on the grill.

"It's good Nicky, really really good. I mean I love her. I never stopped."

"I know, we all know. I am really happy for you Eddie. How did Cassie take it."

"It sucked, it was the worst thing I ever had to do. But she knew, she called me out. She said she knew we were never going down the aisle."

"Wow."

"Yeah, we ran into her today. I don't know what Janet said but they hugged."

"Well, its past you guys now, you can move forward. Is she moving back to the ridge."

"Yeah, I mean yeah. I will take a few days after the wedding and take her down to New York to get her stuff."

"Woop!"

They all sat in the dining room, chowing down in the fine meal in front of them. When Hannah started to speak.

"Um, so we asked you guys here for a reason." This meal was in the works weeks, Nick and Hannah had something the needed to ask of their Maid of Honor and Best Man. "It is kind of perfect now that you two are back together.' Nick grabbed Hannah's hand urging her on. "Well, a few weeks ago I found out that I am pregnant." Janet gasped loudly "And Nick and I would like you guys to be the godparents!"

"Hannah Jane! Oh my god yes!" Janet and Hannah jumped from their seat and embraced, tears in both of their eyes. Eddie and Nick stood, shaking hands and then embracing.

"I am so happy for you guys."

"Do you realize that your baby and the Rowans baby are going to around the same age… the Knights Brigade 2.0!"

"I know, Janet can you believe it!"

"When are you due?"

"The end of November."

"Oh good, I will have to come back and stay for a few weeks." Eddie heard Janet's comment, _I will have to come back and stay for a few weeks _and it made him stop dead in his tracks. Maybe she just wasn't thinking, caught up in the moment. Or maybe she had no intention of moving back to the Ridge. Did she expect him to move to New York, it wasn't possible with the shop and the landscaping. His mind was reeling, but he knew now was not the time or the place to bring it up. Eddie sat the rest of the meal in silence, listening to them talk about tonight's rehearsal dinner, the plans for tomorrow morning, the brunch on Sunday. It sat there drinking his beer waiting to get Janet alone.

"Hey you, what goes on? You have been so quiet." Janet leaned into him at the table.

"I'm fine, we will talk when we get back to my house."

"Eddie, I am going to my place after this I need to get ready for tonight, as do you. I want my man looking sexy. " Janet kissed him softly, feeling his tension. "Hey Hannah," She called into the kitchen "I think we are going to take off, its later then I thought and we have much to do for tonight."

"'Holy shit J you are right." Hannah called back. "Ill see you guys at the Johnson Inn"

Janet and Eddie walked in silence for a few minutes until Janet couldn't take it anymore.

"Ok, Latekka, spill it." Eddie took a deep breath

"What did you mean when you said, you would come for a few weeks when the baby is born?" Janet's stomach tightened "I mean, I thought we could go down to the city this week and pickup your stuff."

"Eddie, I cant just move back here, Just like that."

"And why not?" Eddie was trying to control his temper knowing anger would get him nowhere.

"Well, I have a lease, that Rory cant afford alone. I have a job that I love, I have friends and a life in NY. You just want me to give that up?" Janet was feeling her body tingle.

"Jem, I want you here with me. Everyday, every morning, every night. I don't want you hundreds of miles away. And I cant move to NY with the shop. If it wasn't for that I would just to be with you." Tears welled up in Janet's eyes.

"Eddie, I am sorry, but I am not ready to live back here. I am leaving on Sunday with Rory and Brett as planned."

"Are you fucking kidding me, is that what this is about Brett?"

"Don't you dare, Eddie. Don't." Janet put her hand on his cheek, trying to calm him down. "Eddie I love you, I do. I will never love anyone more, except for myself. And I am telling you I am not ready to be here yet. I want to be with you everyday, every morning and every night. But I need to know that we are stable and solid before I am willing to give up the life I have made for myself. And if you love me, really love me then you will understand. I work, Thursday through Sunday, so I can me here Monday thru Wednesday. I can take the train to Boston and some weekends you can come back with me. We can work this out.'

Eddie was silent, trying to absorb everything she was saying.

"Look, lets talk about this later, I am going to head back to my house. And get ready, I will pick you up at 6:30" Eddie gave her a quick peck on the lips, unable to meet her eyes, turned on his heel and walked away.

She called out to him, trying to get him to stay. He just waved his hand to her and kept on walking. She watched him until he turned the corner and she walked the rest of the way home on her own.

"Hey Rory, you here?" Janet called out as she walked through here front door. Rory emerged from the bathroom, makeup half done, hair in rollers.

"Well, look who is alive and well!" Rory joked. Janet half smiled, giving it way "Oh Christ, don't tell me you are fighting already?" Janet slumped down ion to her sofa.

"It was more like a disagreement, and then he just walked away."

"About?"

"Me moving back to the Ridge."

"Wait you're not?"

"Well, no. Not now, I mean I can't. we have a lease and jobs. I couldn't just leave you in the lurch and I like my life in NY."

"Janet, I just assumed you would be moving back. I started making plans you see…"

"Plans?"

"Well my mom is not doing so good, her Parkinson's is getting worse. So she asked me to come back. So I got to thinking the Ridge does not have a Yoga studio, I was thinking I could open one. And then there is Ikey."

"Wait, hold on Ikey?"

"Um, yeah. We have been spending a lot of time together this week, everyone off doing their own things. He is really… special…and sweet and supportive. I really think I like him." Janet was floored.

"So you are moving back here then, like soon?"

"Yeah, I spoke to Brett, he said he would talk to our landlord, or we could maybe sublet. I just assumed you would be thrilled about this, that you would want to come back here. And to be honest J, not seeing you everyday. I really couldn't handle that so…"

"You and Ikey, I need a second." Janet laughed and Rory joined in. "Everything is happening so fast, I don't know what to think Rory."

"Stop thinking and feel, what feels right?"

"Cut the new age crap."

"Seriously, what feels right Janet. Can you really imagine living back in NY away from Eddie. Away from me and Hannah, Sam…" Janet jumped off the sofa.

"Uh, Rory. I'll be back ok." She ran out the door, running as fast as she could to Gelson. She had been so stupid, so foolish to think that she could leave. Eddie was right, she wanted to be with him everywhere all the time. She wanted to have coffee with Hannah on a Tuesday, she wanted to go to all of Sam's games, she wanted to go to Sully's on a Friday and drink with Eddie and her friends. She wanted to come home.

She bounded into the front door, scaring Phil and Emily. Janet was out of breath.

"Is… he… up… Stairs…? Emily nodded and Janet ran up taking two stairs at a time. She swung his door open. He stood there stunned, in his suit pants and he shirt open and un-tucked. Janet stood there for a moment staring at him trying to catch her breath.

"I am an idiot… a stupid… fucking… id… iot…" she had her hands on her knees still trying calm he breathing.

"Janet?" He stood in front of her, and ran his hand through her hair.

"Yes, I want to move back to the Ridge, Yes." She stood up straight, resting her hand over his heart.

"Really, Jem?"

"Really." Eddie wrapped his arms around her, pressing his lips to hers.

"Ok Latekka, don't start something we cant finish I have a party to get ready for and you need to give me a ride, I am took old for all this running around."

The music was playing and the doors opened, Janet began her walk down the aisle, following the bridesmaids who went before her. She was nervous, her dress was heavy and her new shoes pinched but Sam was by her side, keeping her straight. He looked like a little man in his tux, walking tall. He gave her arm a squeeze and they looked at each other and smiled. She relaxed when she saw Eddie standing next to Nick at the alter. He looked so happy and relaxed, she tried to match his emotions. So much had happened is such a short period of time, but they were finally in a good place. The best place. She made it to the end of the aisle and Eddie couldn't take is eyes off of her. She was breathtaking, but to him she always was and always had been. He took her hand, lacing his fingers in hers and the priest began to speak.

"We are gathered today, to bear witness to the marriage of James Edward Latekka and Janet Edith Meadows. Who gives this woman in holy matrimony?"

"I do.' Sam shouted from behind them. Eddie couldn't take his eyes off of her, she glistened every part of her looked like she was lit from within. Her dress was simple, white satin. It was a scoop neck, dipping low in front showing off her cleavage, and empire waist and a pale grey silk sash tied in a bow to match the grey morning suit's and silk ties the groom and his groomsmen wore. She wore a bird cage veil over her perfectly curled hair and diamond crusted broach that Gram's had given her. Her flowers were a mix of lavender and sterling roses.

"Is there anyone to give just cause why these two should not be wed, speak now or forever hold your peace?" The small church was filled to capacity, the entire town of Knights Ridge showing up to see two of their own finally get married. The girls were all in pale lavender silk, Hannah was Janet's Matron of Honor, eight months pregnant and glowing, Rory was her Maid of Honor, newly engaged herself to Ikey, Allison had just given birth to Carter, a now three month old bouncing baby boy who slept in the front row, with his older brother and sister, Emily a newlywed, married Phil a month earlier in Vegas and Aubrey still happily dating Ronnie, both too young to make a lifelong commitment. Gramps had passed away three months prior and Grams sat there next to Sully both of them with tears in their eyes. Leslie sat with The Commander was doing well finally out of the hospital after receiving a bone marrow transplant from his grandson Sam.

Their vows were simple, traditional, neither one big on speaking in public. And when The priest said you may now kiss your bride Eddie smiled, lifted the small veil and gently kissed his wife. He rolled the word around in his head. Mrs. Latekka his wife. Janet had never been so happy in her life, she had gotten everything she had ever wanted, everything she had dreamed about. She looked at Eddie, her husband and knew that no matter what came next, he would always be at her side.

"Alone at last." Eddie whispered to his wife, when the door shut on their limo. "And how are you feeling Mrs. Latekka?" He asked kissing her forehead.

"I feel amazing. How are you feeling Mr. Latekka."

"Fine, I guess." He said jokingly as she lightly punched him in his shoulder. He lowered himself to her growing belly "And how are you feeling Baby Latekka?" He gently rubbed his hands over her belly and kissed it softly. Janet ran her fingers through his hair. They didn't know it at the time, but that night in the old claw foot tub, Janet and Eddie made a baby. Eddie reached up, drawing Janet's mouth to his really kissing his wife for the first time. He was hungry for her, the days before the wedding they tried to behave at Janet's request. Janet moaned into his mouth, wanting him, needing him.

"Eddie, don't start something we cant finish. We have a reception to get to." Eddie knocked on the window between them and the driver.

"Could you please take a detour, down Springbay Road." The driver nodded, with a smirk on his face and he raised the glass. Janet laughed happily and Eddies hands wandered up her dress.

"I guess we are just going to have to be late then."

The End

Ok guys, I am planning to end the story here. If you want to see a sequel let me know and I will see what I can come up with. I really hope you all enjoyed this story. I know there were some bumps in the road with Brett/Cassie but it was all leading up the bait and switch wedding. I hope you all thought it was Nick/Hannah's wedding at first… Pleas review, as I love to hear what you all have to say… xoxo CBD


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